Men, what would you do if you found out the woman you were dating was a registered s*x offender?

17 comments

1. Not date her?

2. Context matters. She could have done something 2-3 decades ago that gained her the status.

   But personally, I feel that’s a discussion that should happen on the front-end before feelings develop. Anything less is unethical.

3. Look, while on one hand I don’t believe people truly change that much I think its also important to note what the charge was and how long ago was it.

   Being a sex offender is a bit too serious for me to be comfortable with said person.

4. Matters what kind of sex offender. If was peeing in public and government labeled her as sex offender or she drug guys and raped them. Matters

5. It depends on the crime. If it was a sex offense *against* someone, I would no longer be dating her.

6. I’m out.

7. What did she do.

   Did she get busted taking a pee behind a car on a big night out.

   Caught fucking in the park with her boyfriend.

   Those are fine.

   Did she work as a teacher and fuck 14 year old boys. Well that’s a different matter.

8. I would wish her good luck and walk away.

9. Context context context!

   Being a sex offender in my country has more value than in some other countries.

   With more value I mean, pissing in public or having sex in public won’t get registered as a sex offender in my country, actual non consensual sexual acts do but even those can be iffy.

   Waking your man up with a blowjob is technically rape, and I speak for myself and probably the majority of men that we are very happy waking up due to a blowjob.

   But let’s say she actually did rape a guy with a dildo… yeah I’m probably gonna pass on that.

10. Leaving, not disclosing such a severe crime is IMO malicious deception, denying someone the freedom of making informed decisions.

11. For one, I would check with her first.

    The government in my country doesn’t publish other people’s criminal past. That would be seen as a severe and illegal breach of their privacy. There’s no way for me to know if a random person is a registered sex offender.

    So, presumably I “found out” through gossip? I would need to check with her. I can fully understand your criminal past is not something you dish out on the first date.

    After that it’s just a matter of talking about it. Does she regret it? Did she change? What is the story behind it?

    Whether or not it’s a dealbreaker depends on that conversation, as it does for *all* past misbehaviours.

12. Depends on the context. Did she pee in a playground at 2am on a Saturday morning after a night out?

    Or

    Did she ~~molest~~ sexually assault some boys?

    I guess it also depends on how long ago. She could have done a bad thing and learned her lesson.

    Also i gotta point out, i doubt everyone here would be as willing to forgive if OP was female dating a male and y’all need to re-think that.

13. I would nope the fuck out of there but i’m in Scotland and i’m aware some countries can have you on the register for fucking stupid reasons like pissing in the street

14. Probably stop dating her. Peeing in public isn’t really a common reason to be a sex offender despite what people say.

15. Ehh. I have kids. Even if the SO is essentially harmless (public urination, etc.) Thats a dealbreaker for me. I dont need the stigma of being the idiot single father who has his kid around a sex offender, tyvm.

16. Depends. Pulling your boobs out and flashing somebody really isn’t bad. Raping somebody is.

17. Depends on what she did. There are a lot of “sex offenses” that I would consider rather mild. I mean, it’s not good if she has any kind of record, but I’d be open to hearing her side of things.

    That said, I would imagine that it’s a lot harder to be branded a sex offender as a woman. It was probably a big deal.