Outside of work, I really have nothing to live for or to offer this world.

Is that as pathetic as it sounds?

20 comments

  1. This reminds me of this painting: [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Work_(painting)](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Work_(painting))

    *It has been written, ‘an endless significance lies in Work;’ a man perfects himself by working. Foul jungles are cleared away, fair seedfields rise instead, and stately cities; and withal the man himself first ceases to be a jungle and foul unwholesome desert thereby. Consider how, even in the meanest sorts of Labour, the whole soul of a man is composed into a kind of real harmony, the instant he sets himself to work! Doubt, Desire, Sorrow, Remorse, Indignation, Despair itself, all these like helldogs lie beleaguering the soul of the poor dayworker, as of every man: but he bends himself with free valour against his task, and all these are stilled, all these shrink murmuring far off into their caves. The man is now a man. The blessed glow of Labour in him, is it not as purifying fire, wherein all poison is burnt up, and of sour smoke itself there is made bright blessed flame!*

    The painter wanted to depict work as a noble duty that gives everyone meaning. To answer your question I don’t think it is as pathetic as it sounds. I think work fulfills a lot of people.

    However if you really want more why not try some new hobbies or join a club? Learn to paint, learn an instrument or a language so you feel more fulfilled.

    Ultimately, what do people offer really? The people we really remember are those who offered us friendship, taught us something or showed us kindness. I’m sure you can offer lots of these things.

  2. First of all, I don’t believe that you have nothing else to offer the world. I do believe that you haven’t yet found something, though. Have you considered volunteering at a local charity? Maybe an animal shelter?

    Something to live for is a different creature altogether. What does your circle of friends look like? If, like mine, it doesn’t exist at all, do you have any hobbies that you can use to meet people? Board games? Sports? Home brewing? Art? Anything? Are there any classes at a local community college you’re interested in taking? Have you considered adopting a pet?

  3. well, that’s a lot of us quite frankly.

    if you want further purpose, find a hobby of your interest, join a meet up groups, etc.. there are options.

  4. Do you have any hobbies that you enjoy? I have found a lot of fulfillment in seeing myself progress in my hobbies. They are sports related so I also train my fitness in order to improve, which is a win win.

    It’s not pathetic though, most people struggle with finding meaning these days.

  5. My only problem with work being the only meaning in life is that my employer could let me go at a moments notice for pretty much any reason.

    If I ran my own business I guess that would be different.

  6. You have to make your own meaning in this life. Figure out what’s important to you, then figure out what you can do to improve, experience, or work towards whatever it is you care about.

  9. I don’t think it’s pathetic. I’m in much the same boat and take a lot of pride in my work. I do have other things I’m involved in as well, but work is the single largest sense of purpose and achievement I have in my life, so I put what I can into it.

    You can certainly branch out, if it’s of meaning to you, but you’ve really got to define what it is you want your life’s purpose(s) to be.

    Is it to leave a generational legacy through a family (this, coincidentally was one of my goals, but I’ve no shot at that one anymore)?

    Is it to leave your name on some successful projects at work that make a lasting difference?

    Is it some personal marathon goal? Like just finishing some set number before X date?

    Life’s purpose is what you decide to give meaning to, not the other way around. There isn’t a thing out there that’ll jump out from behind a bush and say “Congrats! I’m the meaning to your life!” What is it inside of you that drives you? What is it you find pleasure in? What do you value? Not just on the surface, but deep down, ethically, philosophically? Give those ideas some deep thought and you’ll come up with all sorts of stuff that have varying degrees of purpose to you. Then, go out and achieve those things as you can, one by one.

  10. Depends on your work.

    If you’re a pediatric surgeon, a conservation biologist, or an aid worker in a refugee camp, then I’d say no, there’s nothing pathetic about having your only source of meaning be your work.

    If you’re just a cog in just another company whose sole existence is to provide a trough for cash-guzzling executives and shareholders, or some other relatively meaningless job, then yeah, it might be pathetic. But a lot of that is a matter of values and perspective.

    But I assume you wouldn’t be here asking the question if the first case were true.

  11. Have you thought about volunteering?

    Walking dogs for the local shelter, helping out at the food bank, picking up trash at parks/trails, etc.

  12. i would look into the 9 dimensions of wellness. i am the same as you. Work is my life but i want and need more then that.

  13. I’ve been going to a lot of funerals over these last few years, and it sort of hit me – listening to people talk about those who’ve passed away. The memories they have of them, and the stories they share.

    Really made me think of my own life and what people would say. Would they have anything? I wonder…

  14. I don’t think it’s pathetic. I just have a hard time relating. I meditated, did a few yoga poses, worked on a mural painting, and learned a Kinks song on the guitar all before 10am today when I had to leave for work. The song was “Well Respected Man” which I think is applicable to this post. Even someone who seems to have a lot of “purpose” outside of work can get caught up in the mindset that song does such a good job of describing and ridiculing. My interests probably hold me back professionally because I am always wanting more time to devote to my hobbies. I guess having that divide within oneself is more pathetic. At least you are in alignment with the path you have to walk.

  16. While part of me is glad I”m not in that spot, I’m also a little envious that you derive purpose from your work. Mine is literally just a paycheck to fund my life.

  18. It doesn’t matter how you find meaning or what your meaning is.

    But it is important that you understand why you find that meaning there. Is it the structure of your work place? The social contact? What you do at work? What your work is ultimately for? The comfort of having clear expectations? The knowledge that you afford your home and lifestyle with it?

    There are a lot of different reasons why you may find it meaningful. And I should mention that a lot of people don’t even have that.

    Once you know why, you could expand this in your personal life. Or you could decide not to.

  19. I hate to say it but I enjoy work, it gives me a challenge and a routine.

    I don’t know what I’d do if I wasn’t working.

  20. but it is pretty normal either. once you had seen enough, nothing else in the world surprise you

    before the pandemic, the only thing i look forward is the annual travel. after the pandemic and moving accross half a planet, nothing changes.

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