Why do I push people away?

I’m reflecting on my past relationships and coming to the realization that I am the problem for being single. It seems that whenever I develop a crush on a guy and we start talking, he shows genuine interest in me and the feelings are mutual. However, I then get overwhelmed and end up ghosting them. Consequently, they move on, and I end up getting hurt. I always doubt myself and believe that the other person deserves someone better than me, I just get lost in my negative thoughts. I’m afraid, but I’m not exactly sure what I’m afraid of. It’s frustrating because I want a boyfriend, but I can’t help but push potential partners away.

Recently, there was a guy I’ve been seeing who wanted to hang out with me. However, I declined his invitation because I had a feeling that he really liked me. He expressed his disappointment through a whole paragraph, but I didn’t take it seriously. Later, I saw him with another girl, and I wanted to blame him for my lack of trust in men. However, I know that the problem lies within me. I struggle with communication and don’t know how to handle it when a guy reciprocates my feelings.