It’s happened to me(22M) lots of times that when I see an attractive woman who is checking me out I feel the motivation to approach her but most of the time I go out, my brother is with me and he thinks in his own mind that he knows exactly how to approach women the right way and I don’t, just because he’s got a girlfriend and instead of encouraging me to go and talk to them he’s always like “let’s go to x place” or “let’s leave” that’s why I’ve stopped telling him when I find a girl attractive I think in some weird way he’s embarrassed of me idk. That’s why I rather be alone when approaching women but turns out that this kind of opportunities only present themselves when I go out with my brother, It happened again today and I’m kind of pissed cause this girl was really fine, anyways all of this adds to my insecurities and the common anxiety when approaching women and I end up being single for years lol.

2 comments
  1. When I went out with my friends, girls would smile at us and sometimes I tried to talk to them. Some of my friends had girlfriends at the time and they believed their way was the only way to approach someone from the opposite sex.

    We were at a mall and I was going to see some jeans. As I opened the door, a girl was coming out, smiled and gave me a look. 10 seconds later she came back to see some jeans too. She was there for several minutes so I decided I was going to talk to her, but my friends saw my intentions, came in and said ‘we have to go to x place’.

    They knew me for a long time and thought that my ways wouldn’t get me a girlfriend. I sometimes might be rude with people who were a little too much or I simply didn’t like, but never with people I had intention to talk to.

    So I told them: “Wait outside, I’ll be out in a few minutes”. I got with my jeans, the girl’s number and dated for several months.

    This helped me see that I just needed them to step back a little and let me be myself when I found myself in these situations.

    Edit: I dont know if this is what you need but surely helped me. Tell your brother to wait a few minutes, you’re not going to start making out in front of him.

  2. First of all, what I think is you’re overthinking a lot. It’s just a coincidence that those opportunities present when you’re with your brother.

    Another thing that you said is that your brother asked to leave when there’s an opportunity for you because he’s embarrassed with you is not true either. There are a lot of probabilities, he might be jealous of you having the chance of approaching someone else because he’s taken. If he’s embarrassed by you, he might as well just leave you and you can approach those girls by yourself.

    The main thing you got to know is [self-love](https://epiclifegoeson.blogspot.com/2022/04/what-is-self-love.html), my friend. Without self-love, you wouldn’t know your own value. That’s the problem of you being afraid of being judged. Those who are successful are those that seldom judge a lot because they’ve been thru a lot; those who drive a Ferrari today won’t be laughing at you driving a Honda today, because they’ve driven one before they are successful today.

    Stay calm and make the first approach. Even if you don’t succeed, try again and again. Build your [confidence](https://epiclifegoeson.blogspot.com/2022/04/what-is-self-confidence-self-confidence.html) from time to time. Don’t compare yourself with someone else, do what you got to do and do your best out of it!

Leave a Reply
You May Also Like