I (25f) have been on Hinge for about a month and in that time I’ve gotten so many likes that if I try to scroll through all the guys that liked me, the app would crash and I can’t get to the bottom. I try to go through it and match or pass on some of them but more come in everyday. And I can only talk to one guy at a time or I’ll just get overwhelmed.
But despite all that, every guy I match with makes it very obvious that they’re attracted to me and want to meet me but every time I hint that I want them to ask me on a date, they ghost me. Even if I ask them when they want to meet (because they typically bring it up first) and after we set up a time and place, they immediately ghost me.
I thought it could be that they only want to sleep with me but even when I want the same thing they still ghost me.
It’s definitely not because of the conversation, everything is always fine until it’s time to meet in person.
I don’t understand why this keeps happening. Do all guys do this?
11 comments
It’s absolutely not all guys, but it’s unfortunate you’ve had such poor experiences
Perhaps they get nervous at the last second, but that’s no excuse
You deserve someone who’s accountable and respectful of your time.
Nowadays most people use their phones as their main source of communication. I guess you can say it’s become a comfort for most people so they don’t have to meet face to face and make awkward small talk. Not too sure why they’d wanna be on dating sites though if they’re not willing to meet in person.
Most guys want sex if you don’t give it they ghosy
I don’t think there’s enough information provided, it’s really hard to tell how your conversations actually go. I’ve done plenty of online approaching, and sometimes I have to carry the conversation, giving the person a chance, but at some point I realize they’re not too interested in me the way I’d prefer and experienced previously. So, I unmatch, sometimes without an explanation, as I don’t think it’s productive to explain that I didn’t feel desired at all if the talk wasn’t that long.
Online, probably talked themselves into a corner, with grand gestures and what they are like, then couldn’t live up to the stories, so instead of saying hey this is actually what I’m like and I over exaggerated that. They ghost to not have to deal with it.
31 male and i havent got a single match, wtf is going on haha
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honestly if i matched with someone i wouldnt ghost them
Most top guys have options. My good-looking friend made a Hinge account, and in a couple of days, he had 90 matches.
The truth is: most women go for the top guys, but the top guys can only meet so many women. Maybe 3 in a week, depending on how busy they are.
Guys can be dicks, that’s why lol
Honestly, it’s just the nature of online dating. I recently matched with a super cute girl, we hit it off, joking, getting serious, etc….. then out of the blue just went silent and days later unmatched.
Did it suck? For sure.
But, you can’t afford to take it personally. She could’ve just been rude, yep. Equally, she could’ve been dealing with some sort of crisis. I’ll never know and tbh I don’t care because I can’t change things.
All I’m saying is, wondering WHY these guys ghosted you will just bring you down. Honestly, forget them, they ain’t worth it.
I see the problem, but the real problem seems to be filtering itself out for you 😉. Probably a good quality match somewhere in that list.
What region of the world are you in
You have not provided enough information to judge. This invites gender divisions as it is posted.
A polite conversation or sexual or good does not mean much. There can be an off vibe or feeling. There can be a lack of a hook. It can be them.
No one is the same. But, you should ask more questions about interests or hobbies, and offer interests and hobbies of yours. A guy interested in more than sex needs something to latch on to. Feelings are not a conversation.
Frame things positively. Talk about things you want to do, but have not done.