Long story short, i(m31) was in a relationship where she(f33) literally ticked all the boxes. The one year with her was amazing and she really had everything i wanted for in a partner.
It’s been 2 years and a half now, and no matter how many people i meet, i can’t seem to take her out of my mind. Every woman i talk to, i automatically compare them to her and find them boring/ not interesting, which ends up with me stopping things as i lose all interest in them. So, how do you really forget someone like that?
12 comments
If everything was so perfect why’d you break up?
Stop romsnticing the relationship
…find the perfect man? 😉
There is no such thing as “The Perfect Woman”…. Show me the hottest girl on earth, and I’ll show you a guy that’s tired of fucking her, and out looking for some strange.
Time cures all wounds man, years it may be but it’ll happen
There is no such thing.
If she was perfect, you’d still be together. I’m sure she was lovely, but if it’s not meant to be then she’s not perfect for you. Dust yourself off, do your own thing until you feel ready, and then find the woman who is your actual perfect match.
There is no such thing, take off the rose colored glasses.
Go out and get some slump busters
Then just stay single for rest of your life
Let me know when you find out. 6 years and counting here
By realizing that the first 3-18 months of a relationship (up to 3 years depending on the study) is infatuation. During that time, you literally cannot see your partner clearly, flaws and all. The flaws were there, but our biology makes us ignore them.
That this infatuation is like chemical addiction, making us obsessed with the person (thinking about them, being with them); and unfortunately, without the natural resolution of the relationship, your biology has nothing to prick the bubble and end the infatuation phase. It may even help to contact her and tell her that you need to hear some of her flaws because you’re still struggling to get over it 😂
By realizing that the expectation that someone is perfect is unfair to them. It forces them to be an image in your mind that’s impossible to live up to. That it means you don’t see them as a full, real, complicated person. That it doesn’t give them room to grow, fail, make mistakes, change, and grow again. That you don’t truly love someone until you know and love even their weaknesses and flaws.
That ultimately, thinking of someone this way shows more about what you want yourself to be and what you wish your life was like than it shows about them. That what you think life would be like with this person, and ever you admire about them, are things that you should develop yourself.
There are support websites for Limerence online, and even if that’s not what you have, people there may help.