How well do you need to know someone to acknowledge them walking around campus?
I got to a small school, so I see people a lot and I don’t know who to acknowledge. I was really asocial for like all 20 years of my life, so I’m not sure when and how often to do this. I am not great at starting conversations, so I often wouldn’t say hi to people repeatedly unless I had something else to say to them (which was rare because I’m not that close to them). Like what am I supposed to say to you when we’re friends tangentially/sometimes? These people are often friends of my friends because I’m not that social outside of my circle.
Do you guys have this dilemma and how do I deal with this on my super small campus? I can only pretend not to see people a couple of times a week. And it’s exhausting to as much as wave at someone because I don’t know if they like me and think we could be friends or if they don’t want me to acknowledge them either.
For example, take someone who is friends with someone in our dorm and visits like once a week, hangs out in the living room/kitchen and talks to me every once in a while. Do I acknowledge him and how often if I see him multiple times? If he’s with friends do I ignore him? I don’t understand these rules.

9 comments
  1. Also I feel really awkward when I wave and don’t say anything and I think my wave looks dumb

  2. Basically, everyone likes a little attention as long as there are no strings attached. Saying, “hi” can actually make someone’s day, even if they’re a complete stranger.

    So say “hi” if you feel like it. It’s perfectly acceptable.

    Waving generally has a greater level of association with it, meaning the person waving enjoys seeing the person they’re waving at enough to want to get their attention.

    But that’s it.

    If you see him multiple times, say hi once, and leave it at that if you want. Saying it every time isn’t necessary and is probably overkill. But you can always switch it up with, “You again!”, or “How’s it going?”, or “Sup!”, or just a head nod in their direction.

    Don’t worry about what they think about you. Instead concentrate on their condition. Are they happy? Unhappy? Frustrated? Curious?

    When you take the focus off yourself (“What do they think of me?”, “How will any negative reaction from them affect me?”) and onto them, then you can weather any storm with them by showing actual interest in their predicament, rather than being mired in, or wallowing in, your situation and feelings.

  3. Acknowledge everybody you want to maintain good relations with. And I mean, it’s college, everybody can be friends with everybody in college because you’re all young and you all have something in common

  4. If it’s in passing and not stopping to talk then a small head nod is pretty much my go to for people I recognise but don’t necessarily know. For someone you might see a bit more regularly a hey how’s it going is pretty good

  5. Stop worrying about what you should do or say. Observe what others are doing, respond accordingly.

  6. smile and say hi (or not) but keep walking if you dont wanna talk. it gives the message that you are acknowledging them but u have somewhere to be

  7. Just want to let you know this is so relatable to me and used to have me taking the most random private routes to class when I was in college lol. I have no solution and don’t know when I stopped thinking about things like this. But I do think it’s somewhat unique to the college environment so at least you know there’s an end in sight

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