Fall in love with men with mental issues

I’m F31 have no idea why this happens! In my past relationship my bf M35 is extremely appealed to beer (when we pass together a weekend he could drink 8×0,5 liter beers a day) and has depression, several years ago he was on antidepressants. But when we met he was nice, cheerful, smiling, he is doing sports, in great shape, so there were no signs! We dated for 4 months.

Before him I was in good friendly relations with my colleague. He was smart, yeah sometimes sad and with no expression on his face. After 4 weeks of just communication I liked him and told about that and he told that he has depression, had suicide attempt, so he can’t date me. But yeah, he had signs of depression.

Before him I was 5 years in relationship with a man, we planned a wedding. He was sad sometimes, had headache. By his look it is possible he is depressed. He was kind and attentive to me. It was he who convinced me to date him. But 3 months before wedding he left me and married another girl!

I know for sure that all thus guys share the same traits:
– in their families dads liked alkohol so much
– they like alkohol
– these men love their mothers very much
– they are “cold” and introverted

In all the cases they left me. I always treated them with open heart. I had no intentions to be a saver for my latest one as understood I can’t fix a man. And there were no signs on early stages of his depression!!!

About me: I don’t have depression, I love life (but for certain I have some issues as I choose such men). I am financially stable, smart, I’m doing sports. I don’t drink alkohol, sometimes only a little wine. What the hell is happening to me??? I even moved to another country and even there found a depressed man
My guess: I don’t want to be alone… But! There are nice guys who like, without mental problems, but I don’t choose them. And my self-esteem is damaged as even such guys refused to be with me.