I(23m) have never had a relationship and no experience with women in a romantic way at all, just a few dates that led nowhere.
Now I found a girl(26) I really like and she seems to like me too.
The problem is I am very shy or scared when it comes to anything romantic, even just showing affection, which is caused by trust issues I got from the divorce of my parents I suppose. It took about six dates and two very long movie evenings on her couch together till we held hands under the sheets, cuddled and had a goodbye kiss.
It feels great now and like I just got rid of a good amount of anxiety but I know we could soon be intimate together. As someone who hasn’t done it before I am hoping for this to come for a long time but now when things kinda get serious I have no plan on what to say or do. I know she much likely is experienced as she’s older than me so I fear my lack of experience might be a turn off for her. Also I’m worried about my performance as for me the most important things is that she likes it but I’m afraid I could finish too soon because I even got hard when we just held hands. As if this wasn’t enough unfortunately she hurt her knee recently (maybe a torn meniscus) so this i also something I have to be careful about.
Any advice is appreciated.
2 comments
Just tell her about your feelings. Most important point is communication. Of course it is not easy to play with open cards, but no one was born as the perfect lover. Everyone makes errors, talking is the key! Just enjoy it
You got the most important part, man. The desire to please your partner. When the time finally comes for you to have sex be open to communication, ask her what she likes and ask her to tell you what she doesn’t. There are tons of threads on reddit about how to do it already, all you have to do is google. But the a big part is not rushing into the actual penetration part. Foreplay is VERY important and I would personally recommend that you go down on her (For this you can read “She Comes first” it’s a book about eating pussy lol and it’s mega based.) before you actually do any PIV. But I think for your first time you should prioritize just creating an environment where both of you feel safe and not pressured to perform.