My partner (28F) and I (28M) have been sexually active for many years, but we’ve typically avoided penetration due to certain issues. Lately we’ve been trying to tackle it. Note that we are each other’s first sexual partner so we are **wildly ignorant.**
Her usual preferred way of cumming is me rubbing/bumping my penis against her clit from the outside. (See point 4 on why this is an issue)
I’m having real trouble penetrating for a few different reasons:
1. I have trouble maintaining the erection. Once I get to full size, it honestly doesn’t stay there for long once I try to penetrate her with it. And the more I think about it, the worse it gets until I just go completely flaccid and am unable to get it up again.
2. I can’t fit it in. No, I don’t have a massive dong, it’s extremely average. I can’t fit my penis into her vagina nor this silicon pocket pussy I’ve tried *(The hole is smaller than my pinky, is that the really the diameter I need to squeeze into?)*. Once I try too hard, the same issue as above occurs.
3. If I try to force in my penis despite it losing its erection, I either just cum if I’m still turned on enough due to the stimulation (while turning flaccid), or yea I just turn completely flaccid and it slips out.
4. I don’t know if I have phimosis. Yes it’s pretty tight, but I wouldn’t say I feel pain pulling the foreskin back. What actually hurts is the “ledges” around the tip of the penis (where ppl tuck their foreskin). That pain naturally contributes to the difficulty of everything.
Summary: I try to penetrate while pulling my foreskin back -> It’s too sensitive + It’s too tight -> I start losing my erection while simultaneously feeling pleasure + pain -> I either cum before I penetrate fully or I just go flaccid.
I currently use Viagra when needed, which helps as the pain will not make my penis turn flaccid. This is just a temporary solution so I can still keep her sexually satisfied.
Will gladly provide any other information needed.
2 comments
You are really anxious leading to the inability to stay hard.
You might not be doing enough foreplay to allow for easy penetration.
As for the foreskin problem i think most people typically work on it themselves when they are masturbating to make it easier during actual sex to perform.
Dont keep using viagra like the way you are now or it can create a dependency then it creates a whole new can of worms
The silicone toy most definitely isn’t too small. It will stretch just fine to fit around you. Your girlfriend isn’t aroused enough if you’re having trouble there, use more lube and lots and lots of foreplay.