Can talking to stores workers eventually help builds my confidence?

4 comments

1. for me what helped was mun. first conference always overwhelming but second is fun and helps socialize

2. I could see that helping. Just remember that they might feel uncomfortable breaking off if you’re still asking them things, so you’d want to be sensitive to their time and any unspoken cues such as becoming more curt with their answers.

3. Hi, shift manager at a retail store here! I feel like this could possibly work, but I know that I and some of my co-workers are very awkward people who aren’t the best at small talk. I’m very good at faking it, but it oftentimes makes me as a person with anxiety feel very awkward and leaves me floundering for responses. However, being polite and kind to employees when you ask for help really goes a long way, and I often joke that when customers show me basic human decency at work by being nice and asking about my day, the pins on my lanyard, or my outfit, it just completely lifts my spirits.

   So I’ll offer you my favorite little tidbit of advice that has helped and continues to help me with my anxiety in public spaces, talking to strangers, and upping my confidence: when I’m out and about and talking to strangers, I usually pick one thing about someone and make sure to compliment them about it. Be it their purse, their nails, their hair, their makeup, or their outfit. A good “I love your shoes! Where did you get those?” goes a long way and will get you started on a real conversation that isn’t as awkward as asking employees “So how’s your day going?” Speaking from experience, usually retail workers will just automatically spout some response along the lines of “Pretty good, how about yourself?” just because they are on autopilot doing their job. Additionally, when I’m in line at grocery stores and the employees are checking me out and I notice that they don’t seem like they’re having the best day, I often pretend to browse the candy bars and act like I’m indecisive. I’ll ask what their favorite is, buy the one they recommend me, and then as they’re handing me my receipt I will give them the candy bar and thank them for their help. In my experience, making someone’s day by doing something small for them or complimenting them immediately boosts my confidence and makes me feel like a better person.

   In the meantime, if you’re ever feeling lonely and need someone to talk to/practice talking to, I am an equally socially awkward person who doesn’t have a ton of friends and would be perfectly happy if you wanted to message me to talk about your interests!

4. Please don’t bring the poor employees into this… depends on the person and the store but they probably have better things to do than “help” someone who doesn’t actually need anything