I consider “No means no” to be an anti-rape slogan that emphasizes sexual consent. However, my platonic friend of eight years uses it for day-to-day interactions. An example might be:
Me: “Do you want to try that new Mexican restaurant?”
Her: “Nah, I heard it’s not very good.”
Me: “Are you sure? John went last week and really enjoyed it.
Her: “No means no.”
Most recently, we were planning a trip that involved a lot of back and forth negotiations for schedules, flights, lodging, etc. I asked a question about changing a flight and she responded with “No means no.” When pressed about her response, she said she wasn’t feeling well and was tired of planning. She also cited an Oprah interview that states if anyone tries to change your mind, it’s a form of manipulation.
I respect a person’s autonomy and right to choose but using “No means no” in these sutuations seems a bit out if context and heavy-handed to me. It feels weird to use an anti-rape slogan on me when we’re simply negotiating everyday things like tacos or trips. I think we all try to change others minds on a daily basis, but is it all actually manipulation? Thoughts?