i’m in a friends with benefits situation right now and every time we have sex he finishes in less than 3 minutes. even when we do multiple rounds he still finishes in that time period. there’s only been one time where he was lasting longer and we got interrupted unfortunately. there’s not much communication between us about the sex because we’ve been keeping it a secret and both of us are bad with communicating honestly… but i jokingly mentioned it to him one night when we were hanging out and he said “oh my god stop i don’t know why that happens, it only happens with you.” we were joking about it a little bit but we’ve had sex quite a few times and it still happens. i thought this was maybe a normal thing for him but then he told me it only happened with me and now i want to know why.
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Unfortunately that is a very common apology with guys who cum quick….. *i don’t know why that happens, it only happens with you*
Let’s face it, most guys learn their sex skills from watching porn. Unfortunately, porn is done to look really hot, NOT to feel good. This is why most use jackhammer tempo in scenes. It looks great on film but doesn’t translate as well in bed.
If you want your man to last longer, [you’re going to have to show him a better way.](https://tpi02.wordpress.com/2022/09/30/starfish/) He’s watched porn for years. It’ll take a team effort to undo bad habits and make sex better for both of you.
When you have sex, the sensation is caused by friction between penis and vagina. When you go faster, there’s much more sensation. On top of that, having fast sex is more tiring.
Combine these together, and faster tempo leads to a quicker ejaculation. Therefore I suggest slowing down the rhythm and mixing up the tempo.
Tell your man you want to make love. Start with some good foreplay, and after you’re warmed up, move to facing spoons position. Instead of proceeding straight to crazy monkey sex, have him insert you…and stop.
Yes, put him inside of you and stop. No thrusts. Take a few minutes and feel how his penis stretches your vagina, how nice and warm it feels. Tell him how much you love the feeling, and how much you love him.
After this, increase the tempo, but still keep it moderate. Whatever speed you used before, use half that. The motions should be “grinding,” not “pounding.”
Hey, if it “only happens with you” – i would say you are doing a great job at what youre doing!
Some men last longer, some dont. It is all about how sensetive a guy is to touch but there are also mental and other physical factors.
As a guy you can “train” yourself to cum quick or last longer. But that has to do with practice.
If you want to have longer sex not only penetrative sex, try long foreplay, oral play, maybe ask him to satisfy you before the penetrative sex so you can cum at the same time.
If youre both not talking to each other the problem wont go away on its own i think. Someone has to bring it up.
It likely happens with everyone and will continue to happen unless he really wants to improve it.
He does not know how to have sex . A male that knows how to have sex will control his orgasms and operate on a ” ladies first” policy.
And you can tell him I said so. 53m