What was your biggest surprise from growing up as a little girl to a grown woman?

25 comments

1. Learning to ‘keep the peace’ socially. Maybe I just didn’t think about it much when I was younger but I used to feel a bit more free in terms of what I said to friends/family whereas now I’ve just learned to not speak out too much. Always expected that that would work the opposite way 😐

2. Boundaries. Massive shock, did not grow up with them. I always thought older/mature women sounded callous when I heard them saying about how they learned not to give a fuck the older they got, but now I get it. Done with sacrificing myself to keep a superficial level of peace.

3. As a child i was very influenced by barbie and sharpay evans so

   high school is NOT like high school musical,
   You don’t get a barbie pink convertible at 16 ( at least for me ),

   college is NOT free,

   I didn’t become a movie star actor or a super star model? ,

   sometimes life is a little scary and you have to make big decisions that can impact your future! ,

   working in a clothing store is not actually super fun and you don’t actually get to have all the clothes for free ,

   and then actually, like working through what it’s like to transition into adulthood and be somewhat independent is very weird, never thought i’d be excited for a good sale at the grocery store and also insurance is stupid.

4. Hmmm… I guess that no one actually cares about you in the same sense that you’d care for a kid. You have to constantly take care of yourself all the time. I was pretty shy and dependent on my mom growing up but now I’m not

5. That grown ups don’t have any idea either. They’re all just winging it.

6. That my life is nothing like I envisioned it would be. It’s better.

7. That I’d stay the same height.

8. I thought I would have a wonderful life when I grew up, but my life has been a terrible nightmare.

9. Probably that I thought men would stop being patronising. But they didn’t. They got worse!

10. That if you worked hard enough you could achieve anything…. not true! You just burn out from not being enough

11. The notion that women won equal rights decades ago so now we’re all treated equally and feminism isn’t needed anymore. Yeah I had a very rude awakening lol, I miss being so blissfully unaware and naive 😔

12. How much understanding I have for my mother. We are way more similar than I would’ve ever imagined. I wish we had a better relationship as I was growing up, but I’m happy for the one we have now.

13. That it’s really not as bad and hard as my parents said it would be. They chose some pretty miserable lives, and they (and a lot of adults) liked to pull “just wait until you’re a grown up and you’ll realize how much better you had it as a kid.” No, actually. I’ve got a pretty good life and am having fun. Being a kid sucked because I had to live with them taking out their dissatisfaction with life on me, and had zero power to change anything.

14. It’s going to take a lot societally and economically for marriage and children not to be oppressive.

15. An alarming amount of grown-ass men were more (outwardly) attracted to me when I was a 10-12 than they are now. I’m 18.

    Don’t get me wrong, I’m relieved that I’m being creeped on less. But it’s scary knowing that even I’m too old for those degenerates.

16. That my life wouldn’t be exactly like Mary Tyler Moore’s, a writer with a city apartment and a fantastic view! My life is great … just different than I envisioned when I was 10.

17. That there is a certain “lifepath” you are expected to follow and people will get upset if you question it. Its not about you, its about getting married, making babies and basically neglecting yourself in favour of taking care of others.

18. That you really can do whatever you want because no one cares anyway. It was such a relief to come to that realization.

19. Life is not straightforward and no one can promise a happy ending

20. Good people can sometimes hurt you just as deeply as bad people.

21. Just expected I would have kids. Fuck infertility.

22. Navigating through life’s ups and downs, I learned to rely on my own judgment, make difficult decisions, and handle responsibilities that once seemed daunting. I discovered facets of my character – like perseverance, empathy, and independence – that I hadn’t fully appreciated before.

23. This is pretty sad but, I expected the sexual attention I received from adult men to increase tenfold when I became an adult. And it’s been the opposite. It *decreased*. Or at least the pushy, uncomfortable type of attention has.

24. Mean girls and schoolyard drama never really goes away, they just shapeshift.

    Also, that my parents had me really young. They didn’t really, I’m just approaching that age now and still feel like a baby adult.

25. I was stunned by how horny men can be. From older men creeping on me as a little girl to my same-aged boyfriends watching porn and finding other girls attractive when we were together.

    Naturally I’ve accepted these things now, but boy was I disappointed to find out about reality