To explain it short, I used to atleast hangout around the newgrounds BBS, Back when it had general and it was way active, Now because of some petty drama, The owner (Tom fulp) Found an excuse to shut the general forums down leading to supporter party instead, Which is the general forum but you have to pay for it, And I don’t have the money to donate to newgrounds 2$ again on the subscription. Well more so. I sort of don’t want to tbh, Since I usually get handed this stuff for free. And the supporter party there is sort of dead these days.
But anyways with that in mind, I feel lonely these days and I feel like my friends don’t care about me much. I had a girl who likes a obscure japanese goth band called buck tick, That had her friend gift her nitro. Because they did some..Rp stuff..Anyways, i felt sad since I didn’t have anyone to do that for me, I don’t have much contact aside from a few 3-5 people usually, I wanted to have friends that liked me enough to gift me something.
But I feel like none of my friends care, For example, I am “in” a community for a mobile game called cookie run, i said “in” because I don’t have much interactions there, I draw fanart for the game that barely receives much likes, And I don’t have much friends there are from 2 to 4, And honestly all of them seem to heavily flawed one way or another, One of them Has sort of an ego problem, Keeps replying a gif back each time I post a gif, One of them is that one guy who goes like “i swear i am not like them, I understand you” And then proceeds to act like them, Even getting mad at me at times, Not to mention how much he doesn’t support me, No its funny how they even avoid contact with me posting hugs or sad emoticons every time I vent, or just ghost me, Like bro, Jsut say no, Jeez :/
I have another friend there, Who we have so much in common, And I mean it when I say so much, But our friendship feels forced and fake as hell for some reason, And one of them acts creepily kind.
Btw these guys have more followers and interactions than me, I feel like every friend of mine has more friends than me, Friends that they care for them and so on. Showering them with gifts and such, and I don’t think I have anyone like that, The only that I did was a friend who I think I’ll consider a close friend of mine, Who gifted me rivals of aether last month since he wanted to play with me.
Either way, I feel like my friends are terrible, and I feel like I am pretty lonely, i want friends that genuinely cared bout me, Friends who would bother to gift me nitro, Or friends that would be willing to listen to me vent, Not friends that would actively try to avoid it through spamming a huge emoji and so on.
Not to mention, I am drawing fanart for a community i don’t interact much with at all. I feel like I am wasting time drawing fanart for it, I feel pretty lonely these days, I just wanna be in a circle of decent friends thats all.