TLDR: cut ties with a person I matched with after she got obsessed with the sexual aspect of the POSSIBLE relationship despite seeming not all that interested.
I (22m) have only been in a handful of relationships in my life. I’ve had flings here and there but those usually end quick as they show their true colors after about a month or two(meaning strong distaste towards groups of people or interests and I shut it down immediately as those weren’t prevalent when they talked to me originally). I seldom like using dating apps as people are finicky often. I make it very clear that I like to take things slow, get to know someone first and decide from there whether it’d be a good idea to pursue something with this person. I’m looking for an actual, long term relationship and not just a fling. The only dating app I’ve talked to some cool people on was Hinge. I matched with someone on there back in July, 21F. We had a lot of things in common, similar interests and passions and had the same mindset when it came to dating. We didn’t talk everyday, maybe once or twice out of the week. About 3 weeks in, I asked her if she wanted to see a movie and she expressed wanting to get to know me better first which I was cool with and respected. Aside from the base conversations when we first matched, conversations wouldn’t really go anywhere past “wyd? ” or “how was your day?” or “how was work?”. If the day was bad, she’d reply back in a manner that screamed to me “back the fuck off”, where she’d say “No, the day wasn’t good. No, I don’t want to talk about it.” At this point, I’m feeling like she wasn’t into me. Randomly, this pattern would change come mid september. We switched from talking on hinge to talking on Instagram. I recognized that every time I would post a picture of myself, she’d reply to it and start complimenting me either calling me cute or sending heart eyes and fire emojis. She starts texting me on a daily basis but still keeping the same type of conversations. She asked me if I wanted to hang out as she was finally feeling ready to and we planned to do so in October. We also expressed that the first hangout would not be a date but just to test the waters as we had never seen each other in person. I use voice messaging a lot as opposed to texting as it’s easier. One day, she asked to call me so we could have an actual conversation in real time since we hadn’t met up yet. I like to stay light-hearted and use comedy a lot so we were on the phone for about 20 minutes and I was making her laugh when she suddenly started asking deep personal questions. And I don’t mean questions like” what was your childhood like?” Or anything like that but she was asking questions unprompted like ” what type of porn do you watch? What were your past relationships like? How many times have you ever masturbated in a day? Have you masturbated today? Do you plan on masturbating today? Have you had sex before? What type of sex have you had?” It caught me completely off guard and I used sarcasm or stayed quiet to avoid the questions. I’m normally an open book but considering this was only the first ever phone call I’ve had with this person, I just found it weird. She also told me in the first phone call that all of her friends knew about me because she gets “excited” every time we talk and smiles at the phone whenever I text which would be really sweet if this wasn’t happening at random. I kind of slowed down on talking after that. Not long after, I saw a movie that I wanted to talk about with someone and I called her just to chat about it but she didn’t answer the phone. Later that day while I was away from the phone, she called me. By the time I saw it, my phone had literally just gone dark from it ringing the first time then she immediately called me back and something inside me just said “Don’t answer it”. She left a voicemail to my phone and then a voice message on Instagram, just saying that she wanted to talk and that nothing was wrong. I just told her I was busy. With every conversation past that (and there weren’t too many more), I couldn’t get past “what you doing” without her turning the conversation sexual which I never reciprocated. She would send random posts on Instagram asking me what my kinks were and expressing not being able to leave me alone because she found me so attractive. We also never met in person! The hang out never even happened! I stopped talking to her for almost 2 months before she asked me if I was still interested in hanging out and seeing where it goes because she was. I promptly said no and blocked her not long after. I kind of feel bad about it but at the same time, with how random and how strong she came on, I just couldn’t see it boding well for either of us. And her telling her friends about me before we even talked about hanging out and starting up this expectancy from all of them that we were about to be together, rubbed me the wrong way as I’ve been peer pressured into a relationship in the past because the person’s friends knew that she liked me. Was I wrong to cut ties?