I’ve always felt that I’m pretty good at keeping myself company. From something simple I can come up with a response that I’d consider fairly interesting, at the very least relative to the way I am when I actually speak to people.
I’m still young, but for the past 4 or so years I’ve had social anxiety (nothing major, but going up to talk to people could sometimes be quite a hurdle to jump) but the last year or 2, after I realised this, I managed to get it to a point where it’s barely a problem anymore. So, while it could slightly influence this (in certain scenarios), I wouldn’t say it plays too big of a part.
A thing I tried doing is, when conversing with people, to try do what it is that I do when I actually manage to come up with interesting things. More specifically, try to isolate the scenario currently occurring into my mind, and play it out as I usually would. However, while if doing this by myself would result in interesting ideas I could say, doing it in the midst of conversation still doesn’t help me come up with anything.
You may be thinking to yourself that maybe I just got the facts wrong, that even when I’m thinking by myself what I’m thinking isn’t more interesting, it just seems so because I’m coping, trying to keep myself from getting bored, scared to hurt my pride etc. In other words, being delusional. However I’m sure this isn’t the case because there have been instances where, for whatever reason, I could interact with people just as I would in my mind: interesting ideas, humorous replies, and overall energy. Seeing the acknowledgement and respect that that would bring me slowly dissipate after I revert to how I generally am can be pretty frustrating.
As such, I’ve trying to rack my brain more during conversation, tried to take the more ‘as it comes’ approach, tried to place my mind into a position from which it can create interesting responses, but I still can’t manage to come up with much when it actually comes to it. Maybe one of you might have a new idea, or maybe the way I’ve been doing something can be improved. I’m open to listen to anything. Thank you.