Hey /r/relationship_advice, I could really use some guidance on a delicate situation I’ve found myself in. I made a throwaway because my regular username is known by friends and family.
My husband, who’s previously had a troubling history with gambling, recently revealed that he won a significant amount of money through online gambling on Stake. While the win is substantial (around $20,000) and could help us make a dent in our mortgage, his past is what’s making me uneasy. He’s had instances where he’s lost large sums, like $5k over a weekend in Vegas. Five years ago, he committed to quitting gambling altogether, yet this recent event has occurred.
I’m struggling with mixed feelings. On one hand, this money is a blessing for our financial situation. It would pay off around 1/3 of our mortgage. On the other hand, I’m deeply concerned that this could lead to a resurgence of his gambling habits. I want to support him but not at the expense of potentially spiraling back into the negative impacts of gambling.
After expressing my concerns and reminding him of his past promises, he assured me this was a one-time incident and that he’s self-excluded from the site. I even checked our banking statements, which confirmed this was his only gambling activity since his vow to stop.
My friends and family have given me a wide range of advice, leaving me more confused and worried about the best course of action. What I’m seeking is a strategy to approach this situation constructively. How can I ensure this incident doesn’t lead to future gambling? What steps can we take together to reinforce and respect the boundaries around gambling? Your insights, especially from those who have navigated similar challenges, would be invaluable. I want to make informed decisions that protect our family’s wellbeing and financial future. Thank you.