I’m so sorry for posting this . I even feel ashamed to tell the whole story . I’m feeling disgusted and I’ve never hated myself this much before . TW …
My boyfriend and I have been living together for some months now . Last night he came back from work pretty annoyed and angry about some stuff that happened at his office and he asked if I could give him some space . Although i was worried about him but as long as he’s okay , i’m okay too so i went to our room and laid there a bit . Some minutes later he came in there , grabbed me and pulled me to himself and we started kissing . Everything was okay and we started making love . It was all going well although i noticed he’s a bit different than the other times that we’ve done it , but it was still okay . Until he became a whole different person and started acting super angry and rough . I’m not into BDSM , he knows it , and we’ve never had any rough sex before cause i really don’t like it but this time he just started it without even asking me anything . I tried to calm him down a bit but not only it didn’t work but it also made him so much worse . Then he suddenly pushed me to the bed , held my mouth so hard that i couldn’t breathe . I started crying without even wanting to . I was trying to tell him to stop but couldn’t . I’m so so sorry for saying this part like this … but then he forcefully put his whole fist in there . I was in so much pain i felt like i was dying . I was actually trying to make him leave me alone and just go away but he was holding me too tight i couldn’t even move . I’ve been bleeding since last night and i have so much pain . I can’t stop crying and thinking about what happened last night . I feel disgusted and i hate myself . I don’t even know how to talk about it with him i’m just so scared . I have no idea if he ejaculated in me or not . How can I talk about it with him? How can I make sure he didn’t try to make me pregnant at least? I’m so confused and lost