Hello, so yes I am (f25) virgin. I have tried fingering myself when I was a teen but I could only do one finger at a time and also always grossed out at fingering myself. I would always watch porn and rub my clit to get an orgasm. I am not even sure if I can consider that as an orgasm. Also, my clit would get so sensitive after each orgasm and can’t have more than one orgasm at a time.
I am married now, me and my husband tried PIV but only his tip could go in and even then it would hurt me. Never used a tempon either. I have just been too scared of PIV all my life that it would hurt me. After doing some research on my own, I realized I could possibly have vaginismus where my pelvic floor muscles just contracts involuntary and wouldn’t let anything in. I started dilating on my own. There is progress for sure but it’s slow and I am not close enough size of dilator as my husband’s size.
Whenever we get intimate, at first, I used to get off from oral but it doesn’t work anymore. I need to rub my clit for some time while my husband plays with my boobs and I BJ him. After rubbing my clit for a while, my mind would just want to give up on having orgasm but I still try to focus and then I would orgasm. It has been going on since past few months and I just don’t know what to do. I have had two clitoral orgasms in a row a few times. Also, I have stopped watching porn. How do I masterbate on my own without watching porn?
I am tired, I see people enjoying PIV and getting off multiple times and I can’t even think of PIV yet. My husband is so supportive and always thinks about me before him and will help me with whatever I want to do.
I know I am still new at this and haven’t explored my body a lot. I don’t know what to do. Please help!