Ever ran into a situation where (not trying to humble brag/be pretentious at all) you walk into a venue/lounge/bar with a decent ratio and you can just sense the various eyes of interest from women and/or disdain from other men?
You try to stay low key and position yourself away from the busy section of the bar or dance floor but you start noticing a lot of subtle choosing signals from women. Some are none verbal and others more direct such as a few women hovering around your vicinity.
I’m usually fairly picky with women so when I notice it, I generally ignore or act like I didn’t notice. Which usually ends in them taking a more direct approach (aggressively touchy, being obnoxiously super close, etc) and by the ones I’m not interested in at all.
Mind you I’m polite about it and respectfully decline but by that time, the one I’m interested in (usually across the venue) has already noticed the few suitors and puts a huge guard up (understandably so).
After 2-3 confirming eye exchanges, I make my move and I’m 80% of the time met with the whole “you look like a player” line. Which I jokingly/playfully pivot away from and spark up a more light hearted conversation. About 15-20 min in of making her comfortable I close on her number and set up a date or a time to meet up during the week.
Now this is where I have issues. 90% usually say it sounds like you’ve done this a lot and tend to give me a bombastic side eye or an uncertain look prior to giving out the number which ends up in me getting ghosted even after sending a neutral/polite follow up text to see if she got home safe the next morning.
Idk if it’s a Western thing but just seems (from my perspective) like the dating scene has taken a drastic shift for the worst when it comes to cold approaches. Also, I’ve never been into online dating. Takes the edge off from a natural approach which I don’t want to loose.
Anyway, my point is that the dating environment and how people approach each other outside of apps has taken a turn for the worst.