How do you get over feeling like you’re not good enough in a male dominated industry?

6 comments

1. I work in IT, only 30% of the IT workers are female

   I got over the feeling I wasn’t good enough by becoming better than my male co-workers, I got promotion after promotion until I was leading a team and soon making more money than anyone else I knew in the field

   Work hard, harder than any male in the industry, don’t just show them that you’re on the same level as them, show them that you’re BETTER than they are.

2. Easy. Be good enough. When you are a top performer you KNOW it. I am a diesel mechanic and run circles around the majority of my colleagues. I know it, they know it. I have never in my 25 years in this industry ever felt like I was not good enough.

3. They open their mouth and it’s crystal clear that they’re 90% ego and 10% knowledge/experience while I have years under my belt and know the rules & regulations back and front. Always having to tell these men how to do their jobs..

4. Just a reminder that it’s not easier for men to work, but males just tend to be more prone to sucking in their pain or feeling in, in order to perform. Us men have absolutely no value in the eyes of society without our performance, so we all go all-in, work-side… Women are inherently born with the gift of giving life, that’s always better than « you’re a nobody and you’ll be alone with no value for the rest of your life if you doesn’t go full blast in some work »

   Just to say here that it’s pretty normal to feel overwhelmed by the male vs female performance difference in work, but that’s not because of some patriarcal oppression, just the fact that if men don’t work they’re useless in the eyes of everybody, that’s why they work harder.

   I’m sure that if you were told everyday that you’re a useless piece of shit if you don’t work hard, you’ll be as successful and a hard worker as majority of males!

   But there’s an ego thing when women compete against men, and men in certain industries absolutely hates taking orders/advices from women, and if you’re in that case, the only thing you can do is becoming one of their own, like a « bro », you have to work harder to gain their trust and respect, and that’s pretty unfair, but guess what, absolutely everything in life is unfair one way or another.

   Can’t wait to see if I’m going to trigger some women here or if my comment is well written to be not offensive, just a fair depiction of reality.

5. I worked security as a humanitarian in post-conflict/war countries. Most security (NGO, diplomatic, private, oil and gas) are males; there very few females. Most guys are ex military or LEO, to them this work is ‘easy’. I was green as one can be green, cause I never worked in those fields. My approach was to be humble, and ask questions and advise. I was always professional, never crossed the line (no flirting, no sleeping around). Guys very quickly took me under their wing, and respected me. In just a few years I was recommended by guys I never met. I meant business and was taken as such. In humanitarian field cause of stress and ‘being away’, there’s lots of alcohol (coping) and sleeping around. How many times I sat with security guys talking about this or that female sleeping with this and that guy. Look, I’m convinced that if you play fair play, work hard, are humble and open to learn, ask advice (people feel respected if you approach them for mentoring), you’ll get a long way.

6. I focus on my own work and achievements, not on those of my (predominantly male) colleagues. I found that it’s also nice to connect with other women working in a similar industry, it helps to share your struggles with others who’ve gone through the same. You might learn something from it, and otherwise it’s always good to feel like you’re not going through this alone!