I (M27) was working with my last company for a few years in a department with 3 managers. One of the managers (who wasn’t mine) I became good friends and we often bonded over terrible date stories. I told her once I thought one of our other coworkers, her good friend, was real attractive but she soon let me know that her friend was in fact married.
Fast forward to now, I left that company 2 months ago and when I did that same manager started following me on instagram. Another night separately but near the same time almost, I saw her friend at a bar one night and even though she is married we really hit it off having fun together and I think she really enjoys my company because she started following me on instagram and messaging me too afterwards.
My dilemma? Both women are best friends and myself I don’t really have a desire to attempt to destroy the ones girls marriage, and in fact am much more attracted to my friend the manager but when I message the past manager she is quite reluctant to get drinks or get out because as she puts it “it’s not as simple as you make it seem” and “Stopp you already told me she was your work crush😜We can talk about it over drinks though”. I don’t think she wants to hurt her friend but wont even give me a confirmation to just get drinks and talk. She did say tonight she wants to get her group of girls together soon and have me come out with them, which the girl who is married will be a part of. I’m very nice and cordial when I message both women, like we all are friends at the end of the day.
Just curious a women’s insight, and maybe what might turn the tide? I’ve been single for going on 4 years, and I just really felt a connection with my old coworker the manager but never pursued because well work ya know. Anyways I get lost in my thoughts and would love to hear all yours.
Thank you