I just really needed to get some stuff off my chest and seek advice because I’m feeling so emotional right now and this is just tearing me to pieces. For some context I never had great social skills and struggled with making friends and this situation is effecting me even more because I don’t have friends to make me feel better abt it all
there’s a girl i’ve known for around 6 months now who I was very neutral about until a few weeks ago when we started texting and talking more. She would ALWAYS be the one to put in effort to talk to me while I’d just be pretty non-chalant. We’d meet up after school a lot of days and she seemed to like me. She would always get physically close to me like when we were on a bench she’d put her head on my shoulder when i was trying to show her something on my phone. This rly made me think there was a good chance she liked me. Eventually I really started to like her back a lot and wanted to express my interest since i thought there was a good chance she did too. I told myself i wouldn’t get clingy or attatched or anything but i think i kind of did.. i don’t think it was too bad but i started to text her pretty often and express that i really wanted to meet up with her everyday because i just loved her company. Everything was going smoothly for the most part and then last thursday came. We talked in the morning abt how we were gonna meet in the second half of lunch and she seemed excited and eccentric like usual! My feelings for her were the type where I’d feel butterflies whenever i think about her and when she doesn’t message back my stomach churns horribly. And that same day she didn’t text me during lunch. 10 min before it ended i just texted her “Heyyy” and she just gave me a “hi” and nothing else. I was so damn frustrated. From that point on I hated the way i felt about her. I wished i didn’t feel so strongly about her. Every since that point we stopped meeting after school and i dont rlly text her because she refuses to text me. I hate it especially because i have NO IDEA WHAT HAPPENED. she seemed to actually love talking to me and then she just seemed to lose interest. I feel led on and heartbroken. What could be going through her head? i have no idea and that’s what makes everything so goddamn painful. I can’t stop fucking thinking about her. WHy do i have to love her so much. Why do i always get attatched so easily, and whenever i do, why do they always lose interest. I hate it all so much. I’m so fucking frustrated at her and just the situation in general. the only reason i can think of is that she liked me when i was non chalant and didn’t care much but once i became more attatached and automatically started showing more care she just stops talking to me. it was just so abrupt… i tried texting her and she gave a dry response which she never would do before. I hate the way I am for this, I hate that i always get so attatched because of how desperate I am for connection. And with all this happening, i dont rly have anyone to support me or give me solid advice for this so I’m turning to the internet.
Why did she stop talking to me? How do i cope with this? Just what should i do in general because this is tearing me to pieces and it won’t get outta my head. I hate her sometimes for making me go through this.
TLDR; a girl that was showing a lot of interest suddenly stopped talking to me and being really dry and I suspect I pushed her away because I got too attached and caring and she liked me when I was non-chalant. I don’t have friends to make me feel better about this so it’s tearing me to pieces