Context: I am 33F and work in homes with Autistic children (primarily). I supervise direct caregivers so I’m there maybe once a week, twice a week in some cases, for a few hours.
Most of the time I get along fine and get glowing praise but I’ve been asked off three cases as a supervisor and it seems like it’s less to do with my work with their child and more to do with how I interact with the parents.
Two said they are upset because “I don’t greet them” which I feel like I do, but I don’t know if I just am not enough.
One mentioned I don’t talk to her enough. One mentioned she feels like my facial expressions are judgemental. One never gave a real reason – just kind of “Well I just get this feeling”.
Now I have a history of social anxiety and I work with children specifically because kids DON’T give me social anxiety. I love working with kids. And my viewpoint is always that the kid is number one priority, and for most of my time working with kids, they’ve basically been my only priority. I haven’t had to really work much with parents. And when I have, their mindset has been “If my kid likes you, I like you”.
So navigating this situation where now suddenly I have to meet a social standard with parents – I guess I’m just looking for advice in that. I’m pretty averse to failure and judgement so every time this happens, even when I assess myself and can’t figure out what I actually did wrong, I still feel bad, because the last thing I want is to leave a bad impression.
But that’s also why I have social anxiety because it feels so easy to leave a bad impression with adults (with kids, be nice and be funny and pay attention to them and their needs, and you’re good).