I (23F) just started my first ever relationship with a guy. He’s really great and we have a lot in common and I think he’s a wonderful person, but I know he has a high sex drive.
I am a total virgin, I have never done anything even remotely related to sex, never even kissed anyone before I met him. We started making out a bit and I thought I was kind of enjoying it but when he went to kiss me on the lips, I started to gag involuntarily. It wasn’t him or anything he was doing, I think it was entirely me. It was like my brain was obsessing over something else being wrong or I just couldn’t stop thinking about how uncomfortable I was. We talked a bit and I said I was very self conscious about being a virgin at my age and he didn’t judge me whatsoever, but I still feel like something is wrong with me. I really like this guy and want to continue the relationship, but how do I get over this first “bump” with regards to sex?
I did search through some previous posts with the beginner and confidence flair and I didn’t entirely feel like one post in particular related to my circumstances, hence this post. I did notice in the comments some questions people asked the OP, so here are my answers to those:
1) I grew up very religious, no sex till marriage, all that
2) I do not currently do consistent therapy sessions as I can’t afford it, but I did in the past
4) I take antidepressants