My marriage is at a stand point….

I met my husband back in ’07 and we got married in ’08 when I found out I was pregnant with my first born. When I found out I was pregnant, we was broken up for some issue that he needed to work out. I decided to give him another chance. I came back to him and he kept hounding me to marry him. I kept telling him no but he said his dad said that he needs to marry the woman he got pregnant and again my answer was no. Then he kept asking so I said fine whatever now shut up. I think pregnancy hormones and him costantly asking made me just erk. So, he called his dad and picked us up. His sisters husband married us. We didn’t have a wedding, just his sister and husband, his mom and dad. When my parents found out they was very pissed and wouldn’t talk to me. Which is understandable. My husband has other kids and this is his second marriage. His first marriage, he got married at 15 with his first child. I guess his dad didn’t like her at all. With his other ‘baby mamas’ he never married them. He has 3 other BM besides me. So, 4 all together. He only has 3 bio kids and this is not including ours we have together. Anyways, our marriage been pretty bumpy for quite a few years. When we moved away from the city, I thought maybe we could try to get on the right path. It worked for awhile but then when I started working, things got kind of turned around. He would lean on other woman, for talking and felt like I didn’t mean shit, our vows didn’t mean shit. He would ignore me when he was on the phone with this chick his cousin introduced him too. I finally had it and showed him how I was feeling. I started texting a guy, sent him a google pic(nasty one) and had to go to the store so I left my phone at home, unlocked. When I got back, my planned worked and I told him that this is how I feel when you ignore me. He thought that was me in the pic but I showed him it was google pic. IDK if me working made our marriage go back down hill or not but we talked. Tried marriage therapy and it didn’t work out because he didn’t see no ones POV. So, I gave up but I started doing individual therapy. Years goes on and we are still married. URGH at some days. Now, it is like a stand still. All I do it sleep til it is time to go to work, go to work and do it again. There isn’t any time for US. The 2 days I do have off, it is spent with my kids and I forget that I am married. It could be just the routine of things and I am use to it.

As of now, it feels like we are room mates that sleeps in the same bed.