I don’t know why but once I say something there goes “hm”, “Ah yeah”, “mm” and a complete silence that is broken by a cool person and everyone forget about me.

What am I supposed to do in these situations? 😭 I try to be chill. Maybe my voice is ugly or my vibe IDK

9 comments

  1. In my experience, the best way to come across as more interesting to others is to be genuinely interested in others. You could sound like SpongeBob or Stephen Hawking, but if there’s a genuine curiosity and interest for those around you, people won’t mind and they’ll still be drawn to your vibes

    It seems like you’re allowing the responses that you get from others to have a lot of power over how you feel and how you’re doing. We can often forget this, but other people are human too. Just as you’re still working on your social skills, so is everyone else and nobody’s perfect.

    In the situations that you’re describing, you’re not “supposed to” do anything. Just exist in the present moment and really take in what’s going on around you with your friends. If you’re fully engaged and not on your phone, conversation will feel more natural. It’s also okay to not say anything at times and to just listen. If there’s something being talked about that you don’t know about and would like to find out more, ask about it. You will get thoughts like “What does everyone think of me? I have something cool to say when I finally get a chance to speak.” You don’t have to act on them. Just let these thoughts come and go naturally and instead try to focus on the present moment

  2. felt… it’s the worst especially when i give a genuine answer or remark just go a get a… “def” in return

  3. I’m in sales. That silence is worth millions. We use it all the time. It has power over you from very early. I suggest you fight it. Stick your chest out and go create all the awkward silences you can until you understand that they can’t hurt you. Go kick ass person.

  4. It happens to me too. I don’t know what you should do. I thought that maybe I’m just not interesting

  6. Do you have bad breath? Hahaha just kidding.

    Happens to me too but only when I touch on subjects like finance or geopolitics……figured it was cause these people have no interest or no knowledge in said subject that’s why it’s a muffled “hmmm,” “okay” “wad ever” response.

    They don’t want you to expose how little they know

  8. From my experience I usually have these reasons when people say something random that’s not funny or fits the convo. Like we could be talking about Russia and someone just says bear and expect us to continue the convo or make a joke out of it and credit them. Or they something but it’s boring because of the way they say it or they say it too slowly so we lose interest.

    But it could be other reasons as well so try asking one of the friends who you think is the least judgmental and most likely to tell you why they become quiet

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