I’m so frustrated right now.
I have this good friend that has this bad habit that really grinds my gears.
They have a bad habit of either cutting people off, speaking over them, that sort of stuff, and doesn’t seem to be improving in that department.
I’ve known them for 10yrs. This isn’t anything new. They are a good friend, but sometimes it’s really frustrating or hurtful when I try to control my blurting or excitement to encourage them to finish their thoughts/sentence, but they rarely ever offer the same courtesy to me.
They said they got it from their parent who doesn’t listen to them and would cut them off often. They said they learned to talk over them and keep talking because of them, but now I feel like they’re doing the exact same thing with me.
It’s so frustrating because sometimes I really want to tell them something or talk about something and it feels like they’re not listening. They will cut me off, continue my sentence for me or answer a question I never asked, etc., and it’ll be way off, so I have to take the time to say, “No. This is what I’m talking about…”
It’s not that I have a problem with taking a second to say, “No that’s not it.”
I have a problem with someone constantly cutting me off and assuming what I’m talking about. Constantly not letting me finish. They speak over me and I’ve started saying, “Let me finish” or “I’m not done,” but nothing improves.
I want to cry from the frustration. It feels like I’m constantly having to fight to get a word in.
It’s especially frustrating when they said they’re aware it’s a problem, but they very rarely catch themselves.
I don’t know how to else to kindly ask them to let me finish. I’m so tempted to try out their methods and see if they notice. To keep talking and ignore them trying to speak over me. I don’t know if that makes me petty or what.
Another part of me just wants to give up. Sometimes I just want to let out a sigh and tell them to forget it because I’m tired of having to sit through their tangent and hope they’ll let me finish my sentence or thoughts.
I’m tired of trying to say one sentence or one story and they’re stopping me for what feels like every other word or every few words. I’m tired of putting in effort to give them the space to speak, apologizing for when I cut them off and then encouraging them to go ahead, but then they very rarely do the same.
Sometimes I’m constantly bringing the topic back every 10 seconds. Sometimes I don’t bother. Sometimes I give up or get annoyed with myself. Sometimes I feel disheartened or ashamed because their actions make me feel like they don’t actually care to hear what I have to say.
It just sucks because otherwise they’re a good friend. I’m so tired of this and I don’t know what to do or how to improve this situation.
I also don’t know how to talk to them about this without exploding. I want this resolved. They’re a good friend I don’t want to lose, but this situation makes me not want to talk to them so often.