I’ve thought a lot about the advice of “just be confident”, and I can’t help but wonder whether that is good advice.
If someone is confident, it’s because they’ve gotten external validation and the “green light to go ahead” from their peers. Whether that be due to looks, talent, or skills.
Meanwhile, if someone is not confident, it’s probably because they’ve never been given a reason to be confident. Or, they don’t have anything valuable which would merit validation.
In such a case, is it acceptable to be confident and secure in yourself? Will it make you more likable, or will it be seen as “this dude is insufferable and arrogant”, if you can’t back up your confidence with good looks, talent/skills or status?