I was 0-5 when he would use corporal punishment onto me, but he left my family at 6. I did not see my father growing up, barely unless he would show up at my birthday once every few years or he would randomly take me from school(forcibly to try and enroll me in different schools)
All my family photos, he is not in it, just me, mom and my siblings.
Now I am 19, I consider myself raised by a single mother. My dad doesn’t understand the pain he has caused, icl I have not the guts to tell him. But he is now promising me trips to different countries as I haven’t been , he buys me things and feeds me a lot. He has become a lot better now that I’m an adult.
I am planning on living with him for a year , 19-20. As I haven’t really had that much time with a father figure and it’s really great because I was raised by women essentially. I need the masculine energy, and he teaches me things.
However he still beat me in childhood, left my mother. I think he genuinely likes me? And wants a relationship but im 19. He still treats me like a kid, telling me things that he should’ve done when I was 12. I don’t think this man was fit to be a dad, maybe a uncle. I could’ve used all this when I was a little kid
He says how he is doing this, working job’s making money for his “family” but he left us for years.
He shows me off to all his friends. I think that’s the main reason as to why he wants me in his life. I cant cut him out, i need money and I need the opportunity he can give me, as my mother doesn’t have the network he has. But I don’t really understand this man, he is my dad but did not raise me.
My dad is getting older, I can’t imagine myself using this and then just leaving everyone behind, going ghost. But thats what my heart is telling me. Suck it up for a few years then vanish. However, he is old now I feel bad, he also has feelings too you get?
He basically love bombed me, he started sending me money, buying me food and promising me things now im at his house and want to go back to mothers