I’m a M(28) and my wife F(23) have always had sexual issues in our relationship. This stems from me having a high sex drive and her having nothing at all.
To explain the difference between us I could easily go for sex 2-3 times a day where she could go forever without it.
There have been points in our relationship where she went all in for weeks trying to please me, and others where we went months without doing nothing (I even went a month straight without masturbating at all for her).
We’re currently at a point coming off of doing nothing for months where we both agree we need some kind of sexual aspect in our relationship to keep it healthy. But she very much dislikes that I’m so addicted to sex
She’s previously expressed that she does not like having anything inside of her (penis being the exception) she doesn’t enjoy being eaten out, she doesn’t like any kind of foreplay, she hates us taking our time, wants it to be quick and done and just wants basic sex.
Basically a quick 2 minutes done and leave it for a week or more; if I need another release at a later date
For me sex is beautiful, I want it to last, I want to have so many unique and different experiences with her. I want her to try to have more of a sexual life, but even after talking with her it truly seems like she won’t.
I’ve discussed going to see a sex therapist and getting help for myself. Possibly seeing if there are medications I can take to try to kill my sex drive as much as possible.
I just wanted to know if there is anything else possibly I can do or try? I feel like having no desire would probably help a lot of things; not just physically but mentally.
It is possible that one day she might have some kind of physical desire to want sex? Or should I truly give up on it?
She has mentioned she doesn’t have much feeling down there either and does have past family trauma with molestation (to other members of the family) which I feel might be partial to why she feels how she does.
I know my sex drive and desires can be very over barring as I have no filter and am willing to try and want experience anything and everything with her. Only her. She is uncomfortable in her own skin and always has been, but this has nothing to do with her sex drive.
I have stopped masturbating completely after going cold turkey for a month, which I find I don’t get as horny as I would on a daily basis, but those inner most desires are still there.
I love her and want to make things as easy and best for our relationship. She’s always been good to me.
I find it always hard to know that even she feels that I was the happiest in our relationship when she was trying with sex. But in the end it truly does nothing for her.