Yeah this isn’t my best moment and I’m very embarrassed. My friend and her boyfriend are a match made in hell. From what she told me he is verbally abusive, nasty, he mentioned cheating on her during her birthday, he always screams at her, she thinks a lot of women from her job want to be with him, and he manipulated her into having unprotected sex and made her believe that birth control isn’t a good option that “it will ruin her fertility in the future”. The guy is horrible and I have no idea why she’s even with him. I feel like the constant issues she has with him is draining our friendship.
It seems they are doing really well now. As she keeps reminding me all the time that the relationship is going so well. I have been hearing they are doing well for the longest time. So basically, my fiancé and I are doing temporary long distance due to the K1 fiancé visa. It won’t be a long time maybe a year max. My fiancé and I are in constant contact we talk a lot on the phone, text, and FaceTime. I must say as hard as this situation is he really does it all to make me feel comfortable and secure in our relationship even when being long distant.
Last night he texted me when my friend and I were out. So I texted him back and my friend commented that she thinks he’s clingy. I think she’s a bit jealous because she always complains that her boyfriend is dry at texting. She then went on to tell me that she could never be with my boyfriend because “he’s clingy” and that she likes being the clingy one in the relationship. She also said that my fiancé doesn’t have a masculine built like her boyfriend. She then proceeded to say that he’s too soft and feminine in appearance while her boyfriend “is built like a real man”. I was beyond pissed I was livid. My fiancé is Korean and I have heard in the past that people compared Asian men to looking “feminine”. My fiancé has a military built and he was a marine in Korea. When I met his dad’s friend in Korea he even told me that a small percent of men become marines and that my fiancé was a part of that small percent of men. I told my friend “Are you aware that he was in the marines?” and I told her about the small percent of men that become marines and that my fiancé is a part of that percent of people.
I then added on by saying “from what I’ve seen your boyfriend seems to be chubby but you don’t see me criticizing his appearance and saying my fiancé is physically more of a man?”. She went pretty quiet and said “….you’re right”. But I’m so upset over her criticizing my fiancé and claiming her boyfriend is physically more of a man. I’m not proud of what I said about her boyfriend. I don’t know if I should apologize or was I right by putting her in her place?