I have been dating my boyfriend for one year. Everything seems to go amazing between the two of us, we live together and he takes care of me.
There is one thing that is stressing me right now a lot: I am jealous of his ex-girlfriend. He told me that they have been dating for four years and had an on and off situation the whole relationship. Then he met me and never got in touch again with her, but once to ask her for a thing that she had that belonged to him. But I have observed that when he is on his Instagram and she posts something he stares at it for a while before scrolling or skipping to the next story. I asked him once if he is still in love with her and he told me that he is over her and he is all about me now. But he keeps having this behaviour when she posts something.
I feel so jealous of her, because she is way more pretty, she is the type of girl that wears tons of makeup and takes tons of pictures, acting like an influencer, while I am looking like a potato since we live together and don’t always have time to dress up. She is basically doing nothing with her life, while I am working and studying at the same time. I am obsessing over this so much that lately I dream a lot of her, and I don’t know what to do to get rid of this jealousy.
2 comments
His actions speak louder than his words.
If she’s attractive as you say, maybe he’s just doing that thing that men do.
They look at pretty women almost as if they can’t help it.
I wouldn’t be too hurt by it. Attractive people are… Attractive.
Now if you find any evidence of him speaking to her in any disrespectful way to you, then yea he’s not over her, and you’re the hole that satisfies his needs.
Sounds cruel doesn’t it?
It’s not. It’s just the truth.
Comparison is the thief of joy. Anytime you compare yourself with her it’s only going to hurt. You might think you are a potato but clearly your man love’s potatoes. He may have been with her 4 years but it was dysfunctional & full of drama, that’s why when you came into his life he kicked her to the curb & picked you. You’re his girl, you’re the one he works to take care of, the one he comes home to be with after a long day, you’re his comfort.
She might be a wanna be influencer who looks like she was shot point blank in the face with a makeup gun, but she doesn’t get to call him hers anymore, that’s your guy. I suggest talking to him about how you are feeling, in person or over text if that’s easier. I find I stumble over my words & get flustered when I try to speak face to face. You tell him that you just love him so much & you get anxious & worried when you watch his reaction to her photos because she’s the opposite of everything you are & it makes you think he still has some interest since he still seeks out her photos on social media (I mean how else is he seeing them? If they pop up on his time line it’s because he was actively seeking out her shit, if he wasn’t looking at her page or liking her stuff for a year then she would have fallen off his timeline) & maybe ask him if he’d mute her posts or block her from his social & just go no contact with her completely? To give you peace of mind.
He doesn’t have her number in his phone or anything anymore right? If he is willing to block her on social media chances are she’ll seek him out via text & ask him why he did that. Whatever happens I wish you the best of luck & be a proud little potato! You are beautiful & amazing even if you don’t agree!