For the last four weeks I’ve tried to be more social. New year’s resolution and all that. I’ve felt lonely and isolated for years, and I’m hoping change that and to perhaps eventually meet someone special.
I went out with acquaintances or went to random meetups (a MAJOR challenge for me, I am absolutely NOT comfortable around new people) three to four times per week.
I don’t feel like I’ve made any progress, in any direction. I wouldn’t know what progress would look like, obviously just talking to those people doesn’t make them friends so I’m still lonely. But fuck, this is exhausting! I knew it’d be hard, but after going to after work drinks and afterwards a meetup yesterday I had to call in sick today and I just want to crawl under my bed and get completely drunk.
Is this my life now? Does one get used to that? Am I even on the right path?