My boyfriend gets upset pretty easily. Yesterday he put a hole through a wall with his fist because we had an argument about me almost forgetting that we were gonna take the bus. Today he broke a lamp and smashed his fist on the stove because we hadn’t eaten anything the whole day and because of an argument abt me accidentaly “breaking” a kitchen utensil because I used it “the wrong way”.
Previously he has destroyed three cellphones(at seperate times) because of other arguments we’ve had. Him breaking stuff in fury always happens very suddenly because I never quite register how upset he actually is during a conversation until he suddenly smaches/hits something.
I don’t know how to feel or act abt this. Should I do something? It makes me feel bad and scared when he gets so upset over things that I don’t understand why he would get so emotionally invested in. I wonder if I am the one making him this way? Am I too annoying, am I mean? When we have arguments he thinks I’m mean and coldhearted. I think he is right to some extent and maybe deep down I like provoking him. But when he reacts by destroying things it makes me scared and for some reason I feel cringe and really unconfortable like I don’t want to exist anymore. I kind of feel humiliated that something I said made him feel like that..
I don’t know how I should react when he does these things. Should I convince him to get therapy? How would you react if your partner behaved like this? How likely is it for this to develop into physical abuse?