people always say “just be yourself!”, but i don’t even know where to begin anymore. So: people usually seem to like me when they meet me, and i’m not socially inept or anything. i’m actually a fairly interesting person. i just get in my head about every little thing. a lot of people perceive me to be really cool based on my social media feeds, but i think this has only created an impossible to uphold persona. when i meet people irl i come off as awkward or acting cold/off putting. I also struggle with putting people i perceive as cool on a pedestal and just go basically mute. i think i’m afraid of what they’ll think of me, which probably stems from a fear of rejection. most of my friends i’ve met through my creative/cool roommate, my charming sister, or my kind cousins, and i feel like i can’t make a genuine connection with any of those friends because i’m not letting myself get comfortable. i do admit that i wait for people to talk to me a lot of the time, and i also go into social settings with the mindset that nobody there actually cares about me or what i have to say (which i know sounds insane given i just stated how i am perceived as cool). at parties or in large social settings, i feel almost pathetic and unworthy of people’s time and interest. when i speak, i feel like i’m talking about things nobody cares about (again probably stems from a fear of rejection). anyways, i want to move past this, i’ve been this way for a few years now and it’s really bothering me. it’s like my default mode in social settings. i’ve ruined career opportunities, potential friendships, and even potential romantic relationships. i want to be more outgoing, genuine, and captivating. i want to engage with people and get to know them! how do i start presenting myself authentically again and stop caring so much about how i’m being perceived?