ohmygod first reddit post ever but i can not get this out of my head and i dont have therapy til tuesday. so i (20F) (way too old to be making this kind of stupid mistake ahh) noticed that an east asian girl in my college class at my art school consistently used an Anglicized version of her name on assignments and had shyly asked the teacher to call her that on multiple occasions. One day i come into class, he’s doing attendance, and i think i stg if he does that one more time I’m going to say something (in retrospect i could have emailed him or brought it up privately after class), and well, he uses the other name and so i politely say excuse me professor i think she goes by \[anglicized name\] and had to be corrected by my class that I had spoken up after the incorrect name (I legit thought the professor had mispronounced it) and had corrected him on the name of another asian student. I felt and feel absolutely terrible for embarrassing those poor girls like that, and i hate that I contributed to make them feel like they aren’t individuals. The teacher didn’t realize my mistake either at first which i’m sure added to the sting, and commented on how crazy it was “how all that just happened” and i just wanted to fucking disappear,,, I was in basically a state of shock for the rest of class and didn’t approach either of them to apologize out of sheer shame and not wanting either of us to relive that embarrassment. Anyway I have that class twice a week and I feel so ashamed and embarrassed and it’s seriously distracting me from getting the most out of this class so does anyone have any tips on how to forgive myself and move on?
edit: i also have some obsessive compulsive tendencies which i think may add to why im dwelling so much on it oops