Just looking for advice what to do and whether or not I should contact my gf.
So some backstory first, me (m23) and my gf(f23) have been in a relationship for four and a half years. We had our ups and downs but we really loved each other and had fun together. A couple of months ago we got into a big fight and didn’t speak for a couple of days and during that time a girl I know from college added me on instagram and I accepted (not because I wanted anything romantic with her but because I know her and sometimes we talk after exams etc). After me and my gf resolved our argument she was looking something up on my phone and saw that I had that girl on insta and removed her, and that made me angry because I thought that was toxic but I didn’t add the girl back. Also around that same time my college was organizing a trip to another country for a couple of days and my gf was gulit tripping me into not going because the trip is more or less an excuse to get drunk and party. I ended up not going because I wanted to make her happy. After that everything was okay until like a week ago when a guy from her college (that has told multiple people that he likes my gf and has also tried flirting with her a couple of times) aded her on insta and she accepted and later refused to remove him and we got into a fight( I know this is toxic and I really dont have a problem with her having guy friends or anything but the hypocrisy made me really mad). Later that day she told me she was also going on a trip with her college to another country for 5 days and I lost it. We got into a fight and I broke up with her 3 days later because I felt she didn’t respect me enough and was making me look like a fool.
While I was breaking up with her I explanined that I dont want to break up with her and I love her but her actions hurt me and she ignored my feelings so I feel I have no other choice. She hasn’t contacted me since and I really miss her and I’m thinking about contacting her but the only thing stopping me is that I am pretty certain she won’t change her mind about any of the two thing that are bothering me.
I dont know what to do and where to go from here.
Apologies for any grammar mistakes, english isn’t my first language.