A buddy texted me this:
Bro, I feel lost so lost. Nothing is working for me. I’m 37, not married no kids. I have a job but I barely make enough to save. I dont have any savings. I am not dating. I cant use my parents as a backup plan. I feel like its immoral. I am in bad shape mentally, spiritually, physically and financially. Apart from you I barely have any friends. I want to fix my life but I dont know where to start or what to do. I want to start over but unsure how.
Add: He is 37M lives in Kenya, Africa.
How can I help my friend?
5 comments
That’s tough, I know first hand. I’m lucky enough to live in a country where I can move to find a better job which I did. It was a big risk but it paid off but I don’t imagine it would be that easy for him.
Advise your friend to move to a first world country, like the USA or most of western Europe.
This guy has a job and a friend? He’s relatively young in good health? Imo he’s killing it. The best advice he can hear is to be kind to himself, and find one easily achievable goal each day to get him closer to where he wants to be.
I’d talk to him first. just let him air his feelings.
Then suggest making a plan, list the things he wants. once he has that list then tier them.
What’s most important. Why? How do you achieve that?
Physical health? Run, cycle, gym, eat right etc.
Spiritual health? Join a church, club whatever that is local and join their activities.
Whatever order is important do those things. One thing I will say is, things like kids and partners always come secondary to his own personal needs in this. He can’t be a good partner or parent if he feels he needs to do all those other things first.
I’d also suggest seeing a talking therapist, counselling and the like from a licenced professional.
Listen to him, let him know you have his back. Then send him this to read.
https://tranquilmonkey.com/hunter-s-thompsons-extraordinary-letter-on-finding-your-purpose/