So background my (27M) friend Daniela (48F) and I both work in the same office. We started off as just coworkers but became close friends over the past two years.
I hadn’t seen my friend in a while since I had been temporarily transferred to another location for work. Fast forward to last week when I came back. I found out from coworkers that Daniela had spilt from her husband (any of you who work at an office know how nosy people are and find out stuff). I didn’t believe them at first until I talked to my friend.
I really like my friend Daniela so I wanted to be there for her. I didn’t want to pry into her personal life but shes a good friend and I care about her. Shes an awesome person so I didn’t want her to be sad or anything like that. I swear I had no ulterior motive.
She didn’t tell me much about the separation except that she was staying with her sister. Her kids don’t live at home since they are away at college so it was just her and her husband at home. Daniela mentioned that she didn’t want any reminders of her husband at the moment so she packed a bag and had been staying at her sisters for about two months.
I apologize for the long background but I feel its relevant. On Wednesday night we went out with a few coworkers and at the end of the night we ended up at my place since my roommate is not home for the week. We had a good time and I was happy to see my friend laughing and having fun again.
At the end of the night everyone left so it was just me and her. I don’t want this to sound like a porno or a fake story so I will skip over the details and only mention the stuff I feel is important to understand the situation. We ended up kissing on my couch and eventually we went to my room where she gave me a blowjob.
I thought we were going to stop but we started kissing again and a few mins later my friend asked me if I had a condom. I was honestly surprised she asked since I didn’t realize she saw me like that. I would be lying if I said I wasn’t happy at that moment (My feelings for my friend were always platonic but I am not going to lie and say I didn’t find her attractive.) Anyway we ended up having sex. As we were cuddling after she confided that she has only had unprotected sex with her husband and even though they are not together she felt that would be too much for her and that’s why she asked me to wear a condom. I didn’t mind wearing one.
My friend ended up staying the night and here’s where things get messy. In the morning we woke up feeling frisky and ended up having sex again. Only this time we didn’t use a condom. We both realized we weren’t using a condom when it was too late since we got caught in heat of the moment (I did give her a heads up that I was cumming like the day before). I ended up coming inside of my friend. She didn’t say anything but after like a min she said we should get ready for work and hopped in the shower.
We didn’t talk much at work yesterday and I decided to take a day off today. I’m worried we changed our relationship by having sex and I’m scared to lose my friend. I don’t know if I should talk to her.
I talked to my friend briefly since I didn’t know who to turn to. He said if I am sure that she is separated from her husband and I said yes. He said what if she feels guilty because she feels like she cheated on him. He also said maybe our age gap is bugging her or maybe she misses her husband. He also called me a dumbass for having unprotected sex with her because of the potential risk of stds.
What do I do?