So you guys know the old saying, “If they say they don’t want a relationship, what they’re really saying is that they don’t want to have a relationship *with you*” but idk if i always believe that.
Like take me for example, there’s a person (33M) I’ve been seeing that I (30F) really like, and I could definitely see us having a relationship together. The feeling is mutual but that’s really not what either of us signed up for. We were looking for something casual but the chemistry and sense of ease we feel around each other is intoxicating so it’s making it hard to keep it casual.
For background, I’ve recently gotten out of a long relationship and he’s recently widowed, so I’d rather stick to the plan of having this year for self exploration and self care then us both rush into something we’re not ready for. Relationships are a lot of work and entering into one shouldn’t be taken lightly.
I genuinely have been thinking about just telling him that and just letting him know I’d be happy to reconnect later if he’s still available and no worries if not. What’s meant for me is meant for me, ya know?
But then when I try to find similar stories, all i see is “if they liked you enough they’d figure it out” but in my opinion, life isn’t a movie or a fairly tale and it just doesn’t work like that lol. There’s nothing wrong with knowing what you have capacity for at this moment in your life.
So reddit i come to you and ask what are your thoughts?