I absolutely LOVE my daughter, I (f/25) just wish I had a better partner (m/25). When I became pregnant, I thought he would be an amazing partner and father. Throughout my pregnancy, he was extremely understanding of how I felt. He never pressured me into anything, he kind of just let me be, however I needed to be in that moment. He was compassionate, caring and gentle with me. On the other hand, there were things I did not realize would happen like: him making not making more money- nor saving money, waiting until I was 3 months pregnant to move in even though I was sick out of my mind during that time, allowing me to work multiple jobs, while he only took on the minimum, leaving me to take care of my daughter alone after a week post c-section because “he wanted to train,” pressuring me into sex extremely early on postpartum, not chipping in when he gets home with house duties or our daughter. I have to tell him what to do if I need or want any form of support or help- otherwise he will not take initiative to do it. He has never offered to watch our daughter, so I can go to the gym or have some me time. (I haven’t been able to do my hair, nails nor work out in a gym setting for four months already). The only reason we have food in the house is because I got approved for food stamps, he left our fridge empty for weeks postpartum. He has never purchased anything for our daughter besides a book and toy for Christmas. At some point, we were able to save over $1,000 together, until he spent it on his bills because he was unable to make his ends meet for that month. I regret having a child with him, if I knew he would be like this. He would always remind me that I wasn’t alone in this- however, I now see that it’s far from it. He talks about wanting more children, but I refuse. I feel like I am in this all alone and cannot even depend on him for anything- not even to be understood. Besides all of this though, he treats us kindly and is nice to us- which makes it harder for me to process?? How can someone who is so kind and nice to us, not care about the bigger things?? EVEN AFTER DISCUSSING IT WITH HIM???
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TLDR; I regret having a child with my boyfriend because I thought he would be a better partner/father.