I (21F) and my boyfriend (25M) have been dating for almost 9 months now. I recently went over to his house to spend time with him and spend the night. While I was in the bathroom I opened one of the drawers to find 2 condoms. Which are NOT the ones that we’ve ever used. We also have lube that we use and I have noticed it has gone down when we haven’t used it. I confronted him after seeing the condoms and he said that they had been there before we met, but I’ve opened that drawer and do not recall them ever being there.
Pretty much that whole situation made me uneasy and I asked him if I could use his phone when mine died. He received a text from some girl and I saw other texts in there that resembled him calling her “love” “babygirl” “hun.” There was no indication that she knew he had a girlfriend. I confronted him about that asking who she was and he had claimed she was just a friend. I told him how that doesn’t not make me feel special knowing he’s calling other people those names.
Later after I left I still felt extremely uneasy as his friends or people he knows don’t know me by name, better to put here too I’ve never been posted on social media. Which I know to some isn’t a big deal, but I don’t know just seems weird to me that I’m not somewhere. I reached out to the girl I saw in his phone just simply asking her if there was anything going on. She did not respond to me. She messaged my boyfriend. Where he texted me and said I was paranoid and going behind his back. He says that because of me messaging his supposed “friend” he is rethinking our relationship. Then put me on do not disturb so he would not receive my messages. I am not sure where to go from here.
For context, he has not really been open and honest with me when it comes to certain situations. I received messages back in October that he had a hinge and he was messaging this girl. I had screenshot proof. We chalked that up as a misunderstanding.
Am I being paranoid? Or is he being extremely weird about the situation? Should I end things? How should I approach this situation?
TLDR; found condoms and saw messages from a girl in his phone and confronted him. He claimed just a friend. I messaged friend, boyfriend calls me paranoid and said I’m going behind his back. Girl has no idea who I am.