I work at a nursery the plant kind and I work with someone who just has no tact and can’t read a room.
I believe she can, but at other times she just cant.
I told her about how I was having a difficult time at work with a task and that I’d spoken to my manager about it (at this point I was so frustrated I was teary eyed) and I said “I have spoken to her about it I did that like 2 hours ago” and her response was “I think it was bit longer than that I saw you go into her office at 9am”. I’m thinking omg I am upset, now is
not the time.
She also referred to a broken pen as “still born” when I jokingly said it was lifeless, the joke should have ended at life less. It around the fact that it was a brand new pen that never seemed to work hence the “still born” comment, inappropriate.
Every single Monday she comes to work and tells everyone about the events she went to and how she “somehow didn’t get Covid from it” but is coughing and snotty…. every single week.
I came out of a meeting last which she knew was a pretty important one, it was a performance review meeting as I had some personal challenges which were reflecting my work performance, and as I walk out of this meeting, feeling like complete SHIT looking miserable, she said “oh just wondering if you have done XYZ already” NO KAREN I HAVENT.
I’m also the type of person who at 9am likes to settle, find out from our supervisor if there is anything I need to know, check emails if needed, at 9am she will bombarde me with questions to no end, like woah.
How do I deal with someone who has NO TACT or ability to read a room? It’s infuriating
2 comments
Well; this seems to be complex. Try setting firm boundaries with no ambiguity. Stick to your “I” messages (“I think”, “I feel”, etc) and let her know why you think shes fucking up. I doubt she can improve her behavior if you don’t explain why its wrong in the first place (she may have had nobody do that while growing up). And she may be trying to communicate in a different way than expected. You said that she corrected you on a detail about a story, she may just be trying to show that shes being attentive and cares, by listening and reflecting on details that stick out to her.
You have a right to be frustrated, by the gods you do. Hell, i’ve been in your shoes more than once. It _is_ frustrating, but there also may be more at play than meets the eye. She may not be neurotypical, and have autism or ADHD. (Yes, ADHD causes social difficulties because we’re often impulsive and just blurt things out in convos). Hell, I’ve also been in her shoes. It took a lot of people a lot of patience to sit me down and say “Tyler. This is where youre fucking up, this is what you can do to improve. This is the expectation.” Albeit, in a lot gentler and less aggressive tones.
+1 for using the name Karen in it’s correct manner..