My (28f) inlaws (65f, 65m) have a lot of money, they aren’t millionares, but they worked hard to get to where they are now and can afford a lot of nice luxuries that my husband (30m) and I cannot at this stage in our lives. This isn’t an issue for my husband and I. We make enough to survive and can indulge in occasional small luxuries that we find worth it, but not to the level my in laws can. Both my husband’s siblings earn substantially more than us which I mention just to describe the situation more fully.
The problem is that my inlaws don’t seem to understand this and have hinted multiple times over the course of our 4 year relationship that my husband and I are cheap or make us feel bad about things like our “small” house. For example, we honeymooned in France (both of us had an incredible time and stayed within our budget) and when it came up that we booked coach seats for the flight my father in law went “really? How much does that actually save you?” (Thousands. It saves thousands.) Or when we mentioned resigning the lease on our house my mother in law said “really? You’re not gonna try to find somewhere bigger?” And so many other cases of this. Most recently they both started pushing me to buy a gym membership for $500/month stating it would make it so much easier to stay fit for me since they know I’ve been trying to work more excercise into my routine. I could pay for that both my husband and I sacrificed going out, but I don’t want to and my In laws would also probably start to hound us about not going out enough!
How can I address this without making things awkward? Should I even address it? I can sidestep random comments but now them pushing me to spend a crazy amount on a gym membership or apartment is hard to keep avoiding.