Ever since I was 14 (18F now) I’ve been interested in dating, I’ve been in a relationship once before and it had ended horribly due to my mental health and probably the ages (both 13).When I started high school I developed this constant obsession with finding a partner because of how much I missed being with my previous partner. And since I was lonely and desperate I did many concerning and dangerous things to try and find one, I would find myself crying everyday and being miserable all the time because of this.
Since then my mental health is a lot better and I feel like I can try to find a partner now, albeit still a bit impatient and desperate. But I have no idea where to start, I have a very hard time approaching people (especially guys) because a lot of thoughts go through my head. Like if he’ll say reject me (this is a very big one), if he has a girlfriend already, if he’s not into me, what he would say to me, etc.
I also can’t take rejection well, my friends keep encouraging me to “just ask him out!” but due to my past experiences, it’s hard for me to ask guys out and even approach them without worrying that he’ll reject me. It’s even harder when I’m constantly thinking that it’s because of the way I look, I dress, how I behave, etc. And overall not a lot of guys just look at me or say hi, so I feel like nobody isn’t interested in me and don’t have the courage to approach a guy even if guys don’t look at me.
Sorry if it’s hard to read, I’m very tired right now.
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TL; DR I’m a shy, introverted, I’m almost done high school and I’ve haven’t dated anyone since i was 13, but due to self esteem and past experiences I just can’t go up to guys and well, talk to them! So some advice would be very appreciated. Thanks!