TLDR: I (30F) moved to be with my bf (44M) and he kicked me out less than 3 months of living together. He’s asking for forgiveness but I’m not sure if I can ever fully trust him again. Prior to this, we’ve never had any major fights. Nor have we ever ever broken up until now. We planned to get engaged this year and I really do love him. But I never thought he was capable of doing this. Can a relationship survive this?
My bf and I have been together for 2.5 years (long distance for 1). 3 months ago, I moved back to our city full-time & we moved in together. A few weeks ago during an argument that lasted the entire day, I informed him that I was leaving to go stay at a family member’s house in order to get a breather (at this point it was 11pm and we were arguing since the morning). He informed me that I should take all of my belongings with me, he also made a number of other statements that ultimately made it clear to me that he didn’t view our apartment as equally mine & his. My assumption is because he pays all of the bills, but who knows what the reason is. One statement that continues to ring inside my head is “I can live here by myself. Figure out how you’re going to get your things out of here”. He made it clear to me that I was not welcomed there and within 24hrs I moved out completely. I’m bouncing around trying to sort out my living situation and working to find another apartment. This will be a struggle because I also recently resigned from my job (something he knew was in the works).
For the past week, he’s been begging me for forgiveness. Stating that he mistakenly spoke out of anger and that he never actually meant to make me leave. My question to everyone is what would you do in this situation? Is this forgivable or an indication of even worse behavior in the future? No behavior of his in the past even indicated that he was capable of this and needless to say I feel hurt & betrayed. We’ve only spoken 1 since this happened and that conversation didn’t really yield much. He apologized, even suggesting we see a relationship therapist, but deep down I don’t know if I can ever fully trust him to not do this again😔
I don’t have many people in my personal life who I feel comfortable speaking to about this and would greatly appreciate any input from you all.
****I’d like to add that due to personal family issues, he’s made suicidal comments to me in recent months. This is making me feel extremely guilty for abandoning him when I know he’s struggling. However, I also feel as though what he did was extremely hurtful as he knows I don’t have anywhere else to live currently.