This is the place to put any shower thoughts, your complaints/rants about dating, ask for quick advice, serious and (sometimes not) questions and anything else that might not warrant a post of its own.
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I’ve been with my partner for nearly 1.5 years now, and he’s awesome! We’ve been looking at moving in together, which has proved somewhat difficult logistically because we work/live about an hour from each other and currently both have easy commutes. The (only) town in between us is quite a bit more expensive and would add about 20 minutes to our commutes each way. Upon mentioning checking out some of the places to rent and target price points, he said “yeah, unless I’m saving a lot of money I don’t think it’s worth it to add all that drive time.”
Which is fair and logical. I wouldn’t ask him to spend more on rent than he his now. Neither of us make a ton of money, so I wouldn’t want to either. But I was also hurt by it? So unless you’re saving thousands, an extra 20 minutes each way isn’t worth it to cohabitate and spend more time together? Prior to meeting him I had plans to get out of my region after this year but have reevaluated at the chance to build a life with someone, but if 40 minutes of commute isn’t worth it why am I reconsidering my plans? Idk. It took me a while to figure out why that comment hurt me and I plan on bringing it up, but am I being unreasonable?
I talked to his mom during our video call. Seems like she is a nice lady ☺ However, I am so nervous to meet his parents 😅 Any suggestion?
I’m happy that I met her. And although it didn’t turn into anything more, I’m happy that I was able to feel something so strongly. She had so many wonderful qualities.
Feeling what I felt has taught me a few things. It’s taught me that there is love out there for me. It’s also taught me about the things I really value in a person. I hope she’s doing well. And although I feel sad when I think of her, I also cherish our time together.
Still single, I can’t explain myself
Just had a 2nd date with this woman I like and she has shown interest and suggested another date but it’s always about 2 weeks apart. Is it too soon for me to mention I’m worried about momentum between dates / ask what her expectations will be around how often she’ll meet a partner when in a relationship? I have other plans too but I am trying to make dates work sooner rather than later as would like to give it a proper shot. Equally if it’s just our needs around meeting and spending time together differs, I’d rather know now 🙂 any thoughts or advice welcome
Following up to [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/datingoverthirty/comments/1ayxxqf/daily_sticky_thread_for_rants_raves_celebrations/ks14lo9/)
Went back and crashed at my friend’s place after the night of drinking since he lived right around the corner from the bar this all happened in and we were both too down wind to drive.
We got up early to grab some breakfast tacos and coffee and on the walk back to my car I told him what happened.
“Oh! That’s the one of the co-owner’s girlfriend”.
Attention /u/ThrowRA_Sudden: I owe you a dollar 😂 CashApp, Venmo or Zelle?
The guy I have seen for 5 dates is breadcrumbing me. While I have enjoyed spending time with him and think he’s a good guy, I definitely feel like he likely wasn’t the person I was meant to be with. I know it sounds messed up but I’m an introvert and a homebody and honestly would have preferred just being home alone with my dog, watching tv, and relaxing vs. being with him.
I’m responding to his calls and texts but I haven’t been initiating anything.
I feel like younger me would have been sad at this always hoping the person could have been “the one” but as I’ve grown older it’s like I’ve accepted being alone and have been looking forward to it.
How do you navigate dating someone who is still married? I have a 3rd date with someone at my place this week. They have been seperated for a year peacefully and are getting a divorce. Just treat everything normally and roll with it? I’ve dated women who are divorced before and it is not super uncommon with being almost 40 myself. But I’ve never dated someone who hadn’t had the divorced finalized when we started dating.
Hung out with a friend-couple last night and they’re lovely but third wheeling is hard with couples who will spontaneously get affectionate and cuddly.
I did share some about my dating experiences with them which I don’t usually. They were supportive about it and validated some of my recent decisions, which was nice.
I really need more of this type of low key social time in my life. I’ve been trying to convince myself to audition for a vocal music group in my city that has an opening for my vocal part, but the thought of putting another hobby on my already loaded plate is just so exhausting. I know that it might be good for me in terms of building more connections and I do always enjoy having music in my life. But just. So tired.
I returned from my trip to the Caribbean with my cat. It was wonderful. My cat was very well-behaved, better than some kids who were on our flights. I have a great tan and enjoyed seeing my family. After a few hours in my apartment in Canada, loneliness hit me. I have no family here and I hardly see my friends who live in this city.
Loneliness and boredom led me back to the apps. Yesterday I downloaded Tinder for the first time. I didn’t pay for the premium version, I’ve been swiping right on the profiles I’m attracted to and I’ve been lucky that everyone has matched me. I have 3 active chats. Hopefully, I’ll have at least one date next weekend.
Ikea Guy texted me the day I was leaving saying he didn’t understand how we could have shared time and been intimate and then I wanted to eliminate him from my life. I didn’t know he kept in touch with his exes until he told me that night. He has them on Instagram, according to him they are friends and there’s nothing sexual between them. That’s a red flag to me. He wanted to make plans with me for that weekend, I just sent him a screenshot of my boarding pass. He asked me if we could meet when I returned, but I didn’t answer. He stayed in touch for a few days during my trip and then he disappeared. He reappeared this Friday with a meme that didn’t even make me laugh.
I suggested that a match watch Saltburn. I can’t remember exactly why I suggested it, but I know I thought well, if he can roll with this movie we might have similar senses of humor.
He not only watched it but offered a blow-by-blow, confidently incorrect take on it, and when he was wrong at the end, he took it in stride, so this might be my new screening method from now on.
Question.. has anyone had a long distance relationship? Like did you meet someone online and connected with them but you didn’t meet in person until later? How did it turn out?
So I 31F matched with a man on hinge at the end of January, but he was in training out of state. We’ve been talking daily and he told me he wants a committed relationship (it was related to one of my prompts ) so we’ve been talking about everything and it seems our values and hopes for the future align. I just haven’t met him and he’s finally back tomorrow. I’m so nervous. I did tell him that even though we face timed and we’ve talked so much we may not click in person because I know it happens but he swears he likes me and everything about me and I’m hopeful that he’s as cute as he looks in camera!
He’s the most consistent, compatible guy I’ve met on hinge so I have high expectations. Is that naive? Like guys that live here and I’ve met leave me on read for days and don’t ask questions or show interest in my life but it’s the opposite with him, and it’s like there’s no wrong answers, I feel relaxed
I ended a relationship about 3 weeks ago and looking back, I’m grateful for that relationship because it really taught me how important it is to have a partner who values good mental health. This most recent ex of my didn’t understand how crippling anxiety can be and he belittled the panic attacks I would get. He didn’t and wouldn’t try to understand me.
That said, how soon is too soon to tell someone you’re talking to that you have anxiety disorder?
Trying not to get too attached to a guy that I’ve gone on two dates with, and have a third in the books. He’s so nice, and he looks at me all starry-eyed when I get talking about my passions and I don’t think I’ve ever been perceived that way. Still though, it’s early days and anything could happen.
Tried multi-dating, to chill out a bit. Other guy asked me where I learned my English after I told him I was born in Canada to Canadian parents, but grew up in another (also English speaking) country. He was well intentioned, but the whole date felt off.
This is just a vent for me – as I feel better after rant.
But anyway, I’m done with OLD. Deleted the apps – no more mindless scrolling and sending likes and getting nothing back from the apps. I still have an urge to re-download, but what’s the point? It’s usually the same outcome.
My latest match was my first one in maybe 1-2 months, where there was an actual conversation going. I’ll get matches but usually they don’t reply or it fizzles out. This was going ok where we were chatting for a couple of days. Then she messaged to say she felt as though it was a “friend connection”. Thanked her for her honesty and moved on – at least she didn’t ghost me!
But what really got me was the fact that we hadn’t even gone on a date yet, and I was going to ask but didn’t get the chance to. I just feel it’s difficult to get an impression of someone over text. Maybe I was being too friendly? Gave the wrong impression? I’m not sure, but for me, I’m going to be slightly more reserved until we meet. I get it, she doesn’t owe me a date or anything, I’m glad she didn’t ghost me.
I’ve gone through the situationships (both ended with a measly text ending it saying they weren’t “ready” for a relationship, only for me to see them back on dating apps a week later with updated prompts and pictures), ghosting and words that don’t meet their actions and its absolutely exhausting having to go through it over and over again. I thought dating would be fun? But its more of minefield to get through.
I feel as though people are crying out for “Communication” & “Honesty” but none of their actions match this. I went on 2 dates with someone where she said “communication and honesty is a must for me in a relationship” – we had a good 2nd date, I was on track to schedule a 3rd one and she just ghosted me. Fuck me, I thought you wanted “communication and honesty”?! I would have appreciated a message to say they don’t want to pursue further.
I’m just tired of it and wanted a rant. Feeling as though its the end game for me on the dating side, and its time for me to take a step back, work on me, maybe get a dog.
It’s been 3 months since the breakup, and I still miss my ex gf dearly. I wonder if she ever thinks about me. 2 weeks of no contact since my last message. I’m slowly coming to terms that it’s likely over. If she wanted to reach out, she would. Gut punch.
This week I’m having surgery. Hopefully minor, but I have a long history of medical complications so I can’t help but be a bit nervous. My parents will help me out for a few days (they live in another state). I’m nervous to be on my own after that, but I think it’ll be ok. I may have to ask my friends for help and that’s ok.
After a breakup last fall followed by some health issues, I finally feel like I’m in a good place to get back into dating. Any advice for someone who is getting back into it after a long-ish break? As silly as it sounds, I feel like I have no idea how to meet people!
I may give up on my recent match. I really liked him but I got the ick and I’m not sure I can recover. I think he’s more into me than vice versa and I have to be very delicate with him. I’m the first woman he’s dated in a long time
Day 3 on hinge. I have about 7/8 ongoing conversations, only 3 of which are with people who seem to understand how to have a conversation, and get the idea of back and forth and follow up questions. One asked me out and we’re meeting Tuesday. I’m not sure just how much of a match it is, and
Today I helped a friend update his website. I do art and graphic design, he’s a coach at my gym and does outdoor adventure stuff too. He’s a great coach, only has zero creative skills, so his website barely works and looks awful. I really like him. I find him very attractive, he has this fantastic smile that makes you smile, we’re fairly good friends, and flirt a bunch – but he’s also 8 or 9 years younger than me. We mostly hang out at the gym, and we talk for ages when we’re both there. He tells me about all his dating stories, he knows all of mine. I don’t think there’s any real sexual tension or anything, just a generally flirty and friendly vibe. We’re both very friendly people and since we’re both single now things have become a tiny bit flirtier. Oh well. I’d never make any move of any kind, and I don’t know how I’ll react if he will. I have a feeling he might if we keep hanging out, and we will since we’re exchanging some coaching for me helping with the website. We’ll see.
What’s the best app for central texas? I was on tinder 5 years ago which went alright. Never got a match on bumble.
Any liberal guys dating conservative woman? I just started dating a woman who goes to the same church as me. I only started going to church 3 years ago. She’s been going for a much longer time. Despite being conservative, she is a lot more open minded than I thought (i’m not white)
First guy I like in 2 years has essentially started being evasive and disappearing into the ether. Part of me wonders if that’s why he’s the first guy I’ve liked in 2 years.
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I’m starting to get tired of apps. I get matches and likes, not overwhelming amount but I feel a bit of fatigue? I’ve been replying to message when I’m free. Is this consider a burnout?
Met my current partner half a year ago on a dating app and we are still getting along really well. Good luck everyone, don’t give up hope!
I’m in a fairly conservative area and I’m well….not. It’s hard to find someone who meets what I need in a partner and also lines up with my values, so I’m often left feeling like I’m too picky. Today I just had a really good date, like someone who just lines up.
I’m not feeling ahead of myself it was just nice to be reminded my people are out in the wild somewhere.
Also, the guy I got the ick about…I told him about a creepy online date I went on and he made a joke about it over text after the date 😢
I’m literally so done with dating. I know it’s a numbers game and we have to play it certain ways to make sure we get good matches. But I’m exhausted.
I took a break from Hinge from Oct to January. Early January I matched with a guy and he hit me up a few times to hang out. After a few weeks I decided to meet him last minute for dessert. Thought he was kind of nerdy and a little awkward but overal sweet. I decided I would see him again. He was fairly consistent over text and always asked questions rather than just answering. I really liked the way he communicated and his humor, started to get attracted to him also, and thought maybe things were aligning for me. We had a lot of similarities also with our experience and we both seemed happy to have met each other. Conversation and chemistry seemed good.
Kissed on the third date, he jokingly made a bet that I lost and I had him over for dinner for 4th date. Not sure how this happened but he didn’t drink any of the wine he brought and by comparison, I was pretty buzzed. I was giggly and joking, probably made fun of him or said something that clearly turned him off, cuz now he’s giving me the slow fade. Immediately the next day I noticed the shift in his texts, it genuinely was so dry and casual, absolutely not what I thought it would be after an intimate dinner at my apartment.
I feel hurt cuz the momentum we had going for a month has stopped, all the funny conversations and flirting that I thought was soon too lead to physical things, no other fun things I wanted to do. he could have pulled away for any reason at all, I won’t know unless he says something. I know I have to just let it go and just be ok with the fact that he’s pulling away and then stop communication, but it still hurts. It was so early that it’s very possible he met someone else, got the ick from me or just got scared of possible commitment.
All in all, he didn’t choose to have me in the know. And it sucks cuz i tried to play this one smart, I didn’t appear too available, not too flirty, didn’t kiss him till third date, did my own social things and not rely on him too much, didn’t talk about ex or other negative experiences just some funny ones, tried to show curiosity and to get to know him in the serious topics as well, didn’t want to day dream and get to far ahead but some of it just happens, didn’t even save his number till I felt we had something going (it’s silly but I noticed as soon as you save a guy’s number, they started acting up, proved true again), I didn’t tell my friends about him because I wanted to use my judgments instead friends getting all on it. I don’t know, I really felt so lucky to have met this gentle and caring and funny guy, and I’ve possibly done something to drive him off. I was starting to get that “new love” feeling where nothing bothers you as much as it used to, a little happier when doing chores and working, but now I just feel cold and bitter.
I know I just need to ride it out a few more days and it will pass, but for now it really sucks. It has started off so well, and abruptly just stopped as soon as he left my apartment.
End rant
Had a date with a cute guy I’ve been chatting with for a couple weeks. We met for drinks, but I really should have stayed home. Haven’t been feeling that great…been having a lot of vagina discharge, and I think he could tell something was off. I do want to see him again….should I be honest, or just hope it’s all in my head? Should I initiate the next date?
My boyfriend and I have been dating for 8 months. I’ve been really struggling with my job for longer than that now and really want to quit, but the job market hasn’t been great lately and I haven’t found anything new yet. It came to me yesterday that maybe another way to lessen the “I hate my job feelings” is to ask for a transfer to a different office across the country (which also happens to be my hometown and where most of my support system is). I realized that I haven’t actually considered this as an option because of our relationship and not wanting to leave him while we are still in the earlier stages of our relationship.
I didnt mean to bring this up and sort of word vomit this to him yesterday and to my surprise he is very zen about it and said that although he wasn’t thinking about making a big move right now, he definitely would for us, and we can absolutely have a more in-depth conversation about it if this is something I really want.
I wasn’t expecting that response and I don’t know if I will actually do this but wow, it was great and a little unexpected tbh to know that he was on board. We’ve talked about seeing a future together down the line but it was really just something else to know he’d consider packing up his life and moving with me if it came to that.
It’s been a rough week. I’m so tired of feeling like a toy that the guys I’ve dated can just pick up and play with to distract themselves from their ex/their shitty lives/their insecurities/whatever the fuck they’re running from, and to just discard whenever they get sick of me. That’s all.
Mixed signals? Check. Ghosting? Check. Rejection? Check. Yeah, looks like I’m gonna take another break from the apps, I think 🙄
Sometimes I’m happy being single, other times I wish I had someone around who was comfortable dealing with mousetraps in exchange for my catching/releasing the spiders.
Well this Saturday I’m meeting a lovely lady for coffee and then maybe a Shakespeare play in the park in the evening. Fingers crossed.
The pettiness.
I posted last week about how my boyfriend let me know at the last minute about his woman friend’s birthday, then had her come over and she spent the night…
We’ve not seen each other since then. I texted the next day to tell him I was not okay with it (I don’t think anything happened, and honestly believe she did just pass out drunk on the couch and he went to his bed, as he claims). After attempting to joke, and justify, he finally apologized, for upsetting me…
We still haven’t really talked about it, but yesterday I was out and drinking. And went off on him via text (I know, immature and not healthy). About having his lady friend sleep over. About using the excuse that they were both drunk, when he used the fact that they were both drunk as the excuse when they’d hooked up in the past. About not having her just Uber (“I’m not going to send a drunk woman home alone in an Uber” well that’s funny because he fucking never had any problem with me drunk Ubering home by myself!). About how shitty it felt for him to repeat something he’d done with me during my birthday weekend two weeks later with another woman on her birthday weekend (“You don’t own xyz activity”). About not feeling any support from him when my mom died. About him always planning stuff with me at the last minute. We argued a bit, and then he went out to dinner with his friends and stopped replying to me.
Nothing today. Whatever. I wasn’t really trying to see him, and am debating with myself if I should just pull the cord. And he posts to ig about going to a restaurant today with his friends… one he KNOWS I LOVE and never go to because it’s too far. One I probably would have been invited to (maybe) if I hadn’t blown up on my him over text about my many grievances that have been building up over the last year and a half,
I just feel like it’s so petty on his behalf.
I (35M) had my 6th date with the woman (37F) I have been dating since the start of the year. The date itself was amazing once again! Still so many interesting stories to tell, we joke and laugh a lot, and we just cannot stop kissing each other, taking every opportunity we can.
We slept together for the first time, but unfortunately the sex was not as amazing. We didn’t really have sex as she was super tight, I barely could use a 2nd finger. It also doesn’t help I have a history of mental ED, so when Im trying to get in without success I start losing my erection. Of course I played with her a lot (for hours), but she didn’t play with me a lot, it seems she just preferred kissing and cuddling while being naked. Same story the next morning.
I also did not have this ‘woow!’ feeling when I first saw her naked. She is beautiful and looks much younger than she is, but she does have a different body type than other women I have dated before (who were all in their late 20’s/ early 30’s, had very athletic bodies and smaller firmer breasts). Furthermore I need to get used to hairs down there, first time for me. I noticed it bothered me while giving oral. I know it sounds all superficial. I really feel like seeing her again, but sex now worries me.
Went on a coffee/walk in the park date that I thought went very well. At the end we hugged briefly and she said “this was fun” and dashed off to catch the light.
Most of my dates are at bars and alcohol provides some sort of social lubricant. Feel bad for not going in for the kiss but also got the vibes that she wasn’t feeling it. Idk. I guess I’ll just ask her out again.
What are peoples’ thoughts on your SO’s still being friends with their ex’s? Have you done it? If so, why? Have you dated someone still friends with their exes? Did it affect your relationship in any way?
Just curious to learn… I have literally never done it (mixture of of “screw that ex” and just life circumstance that makes a friendship kind of impossible to maintain,) so it’s hard for me to empathize with/understand people who do.
Feeling a bit silly – failed short term thing
Okay, I’m interested in any thoughts, guidance, harsh truths, or kindness y’all can offer.
I’m 35, never married, and have had a few more serious relationships with one quite long-term one. I want the real deal, and for me that comes with the hope of commitment/marriage at some point.
I have been out of my very serious LTR for about 4 years now. I hadn’t had sex in about 2-1/2 years and have basically not felt any deep attraction to anyone in that time, despite many first dates and a couple 1 – 2-month casual things. It’s not uncommon for people to ask me on second dates, but I rarely feel interested.
About a month ago I met someone off Tinder, let’s call him Tom. I’d seen him on the apps before and always thought he was cute. Historically I’ve been flaky in the early stages of dating, especially with regards to first dates, but I’ve made a concerted effort to be more reliable in this area. With Tom, I felt no desire to reschedule our first date (nearly unheard of), and actually had a very nice time grabbing drinks with him (it’s also virtually unheard of for me to come home from a first date and say I had a really good time). We went on several dates in the first three weeks, and things started off strong — consistent interest and initiative on his part in setting up the next date, though we didn’t text much in between.
About 2 weeks ago, we went to a concert, and things started feeling a bit awkward with Tom in certain moments. He’d make comments I didn’t agree with or that were confusing or contradictory, like saying he’s looking for a LTR but has commitment issues. He did make several awkward comments even during previous dates – e.g., I asked him during a lull in the conversation if he had any questions for me, and he ended up asking how far my chest piece went down on my body (I know, very gross, but he apologized the next date and said he felt nervous). I did make sure to share that I am looking for an LTR and am not into casual sex I pushed past though pink flags in hopes that he was awkward but sincere, and we ended up sleeping together last week. Afterward, I asked him if he could see something between us, and he became awkward and told me he could but that I should know he had a “really great first date” two days prior. That stung quite a bit, but we weren’t exclusive and I was still going on dates with someone else, so I tried to take it in stride.
Then, he didn’t reach out. I wanted some reassurance he was actually interested in me after he pointed out this chemistry he felt with someone else, but after 3 days with no word I texted him to check in. He said he felt awkward about his sexual performance, and I ended up asking him to talk on the phone for a bit. He explained that he experiences performance issues and that he was hung up on the sex stuff. I let him know that I felt vulnerable in clarifying his intentions that night, sleeping with him for the first time, and now having to reach out first. He apologized and offered friendship but said he was still interested and could see something long-term with us, though wasn’t actively searching for that.
I decided to forward, and we tentatively agreed on another date for today. He just let me know today that he went on a second date with that other someone and wants to dedicate his serious emotional energy to her. He apologized and said he’d be up for being friends.
I feel used, like a placeholder or back-up optio until something panned out with someone else. I’m disappointed in him, but more so in myself. How, at 35, could I fall prey to that initial spark and disregard so many little flags?
I don’t want this to happen again and feel like the main takeaway here is to heed my intuition. On a more dramatic level, I also don’t want to wait another 2-1/2 years to like anyone and just feel so rejected and discouraged. Any input?
TLDR: I ignored red flags during the initial stage of dating because of chemistry, and he chose another woman. I feel silly and discouraged.
Any other girls really struggle with the concept of guys ‘treating’ them?
My bf has booked us a weekend away next month. I’m really excited and the gesture has got me all fuzzy inside but I also feel immensely guilty. If he buys dinner or anything I always try make it up to him, but he’s insisted it’s all on him this time.
I see all these girls on socials with guys booking/buying them crazy stuff and it’s mad to me they can accept.
I have real money hang ups, so it probably stems from there. I have never asked my parents for money, always pay people back for food/drinks I have a history of being pretty bad with money (took out loans/cards in my twenties I just paid off) always had the attitude I never want anyone spending money on me as I’m always conscious of passing on bad habits or putting someone else’s financial situation at risk. I know it’s dumb because it’s only a small gesture, but still.
This really is a journey of self improvement lol
I’m done, I will never find anyone, I’m M35, in good shape, with plenty of active hobbies, my own roof over my head, a good job, I don’t make a lot of money but I can afford most things. I don’t get it, I can’t find anyone, when I do something happens, now I’m getting the silence treatment after a great first date, we agreed on the second date in person, she asked for it, and after the date she texted me if I got home safe, and now nothing, I sent her two relevant messages, but she has not answered for a day. I know it’s just a date, but I’m sick of being treated like I don’t matter. I’m done trying, and if I haven’t found anyone in all these years (I’ve been single for four years, with no stable relationships only dating, a lot of personal work etc) there is no point, I don’t need it, I’m almost happy alone, and I don’t need the stress of dating and trying to find the one, if it happens by chance great, if not I’ll die alone, doing sports and reading books. I will miss it, but who cares, my biggest regret will be not having children, but I feel like it’s already getting too late and impossible.
There are 1.1 million people subscribed to this sub. I wonder why our generation struggles so much with dating/relationships. We’re the most educated and most therapized generation, but we can’t figure out what seemingly ever other generation before us figured out, even with dating apps making it easier than ever to connect with people who want the same thing. How have we made such a mess of this?
Okay DOT friends, I need you to send me some the good energy, good vibes, whatever positive things works for you, and little bit of courage too!
(Keeping it vague but I shall report back)
In my daily life I feel pretty secure, but dating really seems to bring out insecurities in me. I’ve been on 4 dates so far that have gone really well and the 5th one is supposed to be this upcoming weekend. We’re taking it pretty slow(1 per week), which is good (all the dates have been public, now the 5th is supposed to be at his place) but I’m such an over-thinker and planner, I have a hard time just going with the flow, like just enjoying the moment. How do you accept that seeing someone involves risk in the sense that you can layout all your boundaries and expectations, but you don’t know what the future will hold and realistically you can’t really know someone after 3-4 weeks? I guess I just don’t have that much experience, I’ve only been in one relationship/had sex with one person, and we met IRL, not online, unlike the current person.
DOT – for those who remain in contact with your ex (several years/serious relationships/almost engaged), is this normal while you are in a relationship?
I went on a great first date today and walked away from it thinking “i bet this person is a really solid fucking person” and it was so nice
Rant: I hate when people(mostly men) on this sub say they check all the boxes, have a good job, are in shape etc but can’t find someone. There is more to dating than spreadsheets and lists. Plenty of people have none of that and are in happy relationships. You can’t convince someone to love you because you have your life together, you have to actually make them feel something.
I’m so over the mixed messages. I had communicated to the person I’m seeing that I needed better communication/planning and the week of Valentine’s Day they were great- good communicating, made plans, all around amazing and I thought we were on a good path.
We had plans the following Sunday and they cancelled super last minute. Okay, things happen. Communication started going down but then they showed up to an event I had invited them to the week before on Wednesday (a friend was giving a talk at a book store). A little communication Thursday/Friday by text and nothing since probably in part because I realized I was doing all the reaching out and I was tired of it.
Should I just call it at this point?