I (25m) dated a (21f) who once was my co-worker when we were together we always seemed to have a natural connection towards one another. Things seemed good between us that I mumbling like an idiot asked her out and she agreed before I could even finish.
We went out 2 times both times were great one date we went on was at a restaurant we ended up talking the whole way through we never had to “break the ice”, and even when I drove her back home we just kept talking to the point where I forgot to turn my radio on and she told me that it was fine cause we were talking. Dropped her off said “that I had a great time and can we should go out on a 3rd date.” she agreeded things seemed good.
The 3rd date never came so much was going on in both our lives that we never had the perfect time. I left the job and told her I hope we could still go out to which she agreed I tried my best to go on the 3rd date asked her out plenty of times and she was always eager to go but something always came up. We stilled talked, but with the separation I knew deep down she was changing slowly.
She said she want to still be friends cause she needed to grind out her last semester and I said okay and left her alone, 3 weeks later she hits me up asking me a random question on something I told her like a year prior I gave her an answer and the next thing you know we’re back to talking again. At one point she told me that she was having a rough day and that she thought of me and I made her smile. I wanted to fall for her so bad at that point but I didn’t want to be played.
Some time pasted and I popped up the question “What was it about me that made you say no?” To which she replied ” I don’t like that you think I said no, we’re just too different personally, pursuing different things in our lives, your a great person nothing about you needs to change.” Normally I’d accept that and be done but we’ve been talking for 7 months after I left the job and now she decides to say this to me, so hearing this I was stunned I told her “I never knew you felt that way deep down things between me and you always felt natural.” To which she agreed we had a natural connection towards one another and told “but it is what it is I hope you understand.”.
It stung a little deep down and as a defense mechanism I tried to make a joke out of it saying ” I understand, this is great gym motivation gym motivation I’ve always wanted to squat 600lbs.” Which she replied “oh wow. Well don’t hurt yourself then”
It’s been 3 days now and it sucks honestly I think I give up on dating, relationships, and even marriage out of fear now. I’ve been in relationships before, but none of them felt like this everything seemed to click so easily with her just to be told that just makes me wonder why it took her so long to say that.
Anyways I just wanted to vent that out and get some advice or hear from people who’ve had similar experiences.